Growing pies, is it on trees

Or on stakes like beans and peas

Or hedgerows, just like blackberries

For us to pick whene’er we please

 

Or do the pies only thrive

In the shade of money trees

I wonder, will the pies survive

The discontent of winter freeze

 

Maybe we just dig them up

When they have grown sufficient size

And roughly slice and serve them up

With mashed potatoes or with fries

 

Green-fingered Britain, do not fret

There is no need to agonise

To Liz’s garden we’re in debt

We just need to grow some pies