The universe hates you

I'm sorry to tell you

 

God is getting together 

with Mother Nature

to decide who they 

should kill first.

 

Take you and I,

short sighted as we are,

in another time

we would have

blindly fallen to our deaths

off a narrow mountain path

or been devoured

by a cougar we mistook 

for a benign looking

beige rock.

 

God doesn't like your new

tortoise shell frames,

no matter how sexy you look.

 

No matter how

when you comb over

the insurance forms small print

you look like a hot shot lawyer

about to break open the big case

that will finally reveal

all the corruption going on

down at City Hall.

 

Yes the management are

unhappy with you,

 

no wonder they have to keep

coming up with novel viruses

and dumping monsoons

on the heads of the poor,

 

greetings from the top.

 

Look at me, short sighted,

and with sleep apnoea 

so bad I wake myself up

every hour, saved only 

from choking to death 

by a small plastic

device I insert in each nostril.

 

Yes God hates the makers

of the Snoreeze 3000

just as he hates all

opticians and dentists

and for that matter

radiologists,

immunologists,

proctologists

laser eye surgeons

and all those other maniacal 

pro-life sorts, 

hell bent in their

agenda of saving 

human lives.