Donations are essential to keep Write Out Loud going    

Ambridge cries

Every pity a pithy platitude

pecking at ears too tired to hear.

I'm so sorry for your loss they exude,

isn't it too soon to return my dear?

I think you're marvellous to cope so well

pounds at her protesting brain.  No outlet

to explain they enshroud an empty shell

in a net of lies and angry regret,

tethered down by wellwishers assumptions,

the widest wires not guiding but binding.

To lookers lives minimum disruption

keeping clear of a widow confiding -

that actually, no, life's not all that great

when all that's left is minus my soul mate.

◄ The Tour

If you can ... ►

Comments

Profile image

Cynthia Buell Thomas

Mon 12th Jul 2010 12:37

Good piece, Alison, to highlight the effective uselessness of 'supportive' comments after bereavement. Especially when an honest answer given in confidence steers people off.
I find the alliterative 'p' simulates 'pecking' and is quite effective.

Profile image

Graham Sherwood

Mon 12th Jul 2010 09:27

Sombre piece Alison. Too many p's in the first two lines but I liked the idea of pecking at ears.
I think unlike your other introspective works there is no razor blade hidden in this one. For me it needs an clever edge.

If you wish to post a comment you must login.

This site uses cookies. By continuing to browse, you are agreeing to our use of cookies.

Find out more Hide this message