The pandemic's killing the divorce rate
Those with any sense are not straying
My wayward tendencies are history
These days I spend my time praying
What good is my cute smile anymore?
Why bother all that dressing to impress?
When you're stuck in the house bingeing
How to find someone nice to undress?
When I do venture out a mask is essential
But my George Clooney chin is invisible
Why did I spend a fortune on a new nose?
My COVID efforts at seduction are risible
Only my mince pies are easily available
Trouble is the left one is a different tint,
Worse than that is the one on the right
Notorious for its diabolical squint
I foresee a boom in cosmetics for eyes
The only organs wide-open to inspection
But as I cant afford corrective surgery
Dark glasses for now hide my imperfection
The era of face masks is killing romance
Seduction will be consigned to history
The only winners are those with bad teeth
Who will save a king's ransom on dentistry