Do not lie to me, I have evidence,

you tried to leave without a trace.

Your crime was caught on camera,

see the guilt written all over your face.

Temptation was obviously too much,

the tasty leaves from the grapevine.

A delicious alternative to green grass,

Sunday lunch with a soupcon of wine.

I accept your excuse and in your defence,

I agree a change of diet will do you good.

A suspended sentence is your punishment,

lucky cow, dismissed, free to chew the cud.