I am full of holes

Riddled with bullets 

Peppered with wounds

Parts of me gaping

 

Emptiness and scars

Air ringing with gunshots 

Only I can hear 

Flashbacks and flashbangs 

 

How do you put down the pain

When it defined you

 

When the stark contrast,

Of safe, not-safe 

Was all you had,

How do you learn to be alone

 

How do you quiet the child

Who just wants a hand to hold

Who thinks it's dying

Who doesn't understand that they are safe now

 

What do you do when that statement

I'm safe

Makes you cry

Every time

 

How do you grow through granite

Rubble and pumice 

Fire-burnt, but breathing

How do you clear the ash

 

Because you know how to suffocate

Just not how to breathe