I've never been understood.
Just understabbed and overtook.
Spent all my time trying too hard.

Why's it so hard to accept?

This voice ain't loud enough.
This body wasn't built for that.
I can't do the things you do. 
I wish I could, oh God I do, but...

I accept defeat.

My head hangs low.
Do as you wish.
No spine in me.
That dissolved long ago.

Along with my care and joy.

Empty pill bottles line my dresser.
Opioids, my plan to take my forever.
Too young, too smart; too dumb.
Bleeding at work; double vision.

A sensitive soul killed by an insensitive world.
I can't cope and it's my own fault.

So why'd I take this shovel and dig this hole?
I thought I was loved and served a purpose.
Maturity showed me the real surface;
My troubles are my own; still nobody deserves this.