Limericks for May 12th

My Dad had a bristly black beard

of  which many peoiple were feared

It grew and it grew

but not straight, quite askew

so our Mum with the mower appeared!


A couple of twins put on wellies

and smashed both the family tellies

their Dad threw them out

giving each boy a clout

'to come home ytou must crawl on your bellies'


There was once a Teutonic shrink

whose patients were all on the blink

They gibbered and shrieked

but the Herr Doktor squeaked

'just pay cash and you'll be in the pink!


I wish that my cobra were calmer

said a sad Rajasthani snake charmer

on Saturday nights

he gets in to fights

so I worry about his bad Karma.


Nicole was a pretty wee worm

who attenpted to do a self-perm

she ended up wiggly

(don't like to say squiggly)

so hid in deep grass on the berm
















◄ Loved to Death

The Kingfisher ►


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jennifer Malden

Fri 5th Jun 2020 20:04

Thanks Hannah! Hope they produced a smile at least, which in these times is worth having. Jennifer

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Hannah Collins

Wed 3rd Jun 2020 18:45

I love these limericks, especially the one about the shrink.
Great stuff.


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jennifer Malden

Thu 14th May 2020 11:11

Thanks Mortimer for the like and comment. Glad you had a laugh, that was the intention, as we haven't been having many chuckles recently, I think.



Tue 12th May 2020 23:59

Your ability to tell a story and a lesson in just 4 lines is miraculous, these limericks are so comical I chuckled out loud more than once, keep writing wonders like these, they are lovely.

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