Lock-down came at a bad time

We'd been daggers drawn for a while

Now we're in each others' pockets 24/7

I'd forgotten that you never smile

 

Careers kept us safely apart before

We were ships that passed in the night

Now I must endure you in the light of day

I must say its not a pretty sight

 

We try to keep out of each other's way

Coded messages signal the kitchen's free

I never knew you were so noisy

You make enough racket for three

 

We're fighting over what food there is

I'm hiding cornflakes in my study

We've been married ten years yet

I've never seen you as my buddy

 

You're making clandestine phone calls

Inflaming my inherent paranoia

I like rump steak for my lunch

You insist upon vegetarian soya

 

You blow your nose every five minutes

Another nervous habit I'd forgotten

I'm on tenterhooks cleaning up after myself

Toe nail clippings in the bath are verboten

 

Food deliveries are a bone of contention

Your dietary fads are a stranger to me

I thought Tofu was a Spanish footballer

I order instant coffee, you demand green tea

 

As it is clear we have nothing in common

I'm hoping a vaccine quickly comes through

This pandemic had a silver lining after all

The lock-down's innoculated me against you