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M. Smith

Updated: Sun, 27 Nov 2022 08:31 pm

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A 23-year-old woman, and comma enthusiast.

The significance of a pillow

You adjusted the pillow so tenderly under my head while we fucked, I had never experienced consideration like that before, it felt so intimate. It was so humane. You detected my discomfort and cared enough to act. You cared. You acted. I admit, it was exactly what I was longing for. I am terrified. Now, I must wait with white knuckles, choking on my breath. Bracing for the cruel departure of your kindnesses & you, That is inevitable. But for a moment, now, I will smile. That such a small gesture meant so much, And that small gestures still mean so much, And that I can still feel. I am less jaded and more human than I thought. And at this moment, That is enough.


I’m sorry that I called And said it was an accident. Something about you Makes intentionality feel so exposing. You aren’t allowed to know I was desperate to hear your voice. You might think im Desperate enough to accept whatever you will give me. Again. It will never be enough. It scares me that you might be right. I am desperately devoted To you.

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