A beautiful mess, sharing some of her insightful wisdom, Pain has poured out of my heart, and i would like to show you how I have healed. Please have an open mind, and a rested heart, while you endure my writing. *Feedback is strongly encouraged* thank you<3
NIGHT TIMES Why do i always change my mind? and why cant i find this stupid rhyme? I always replay this in my head, But i make up songs while in my bed. Awake at night i lie alone, Screaming in my head, so i drown in my phone. Flashbacks play on repeat, of times of triumph and mostly defeat I see these visions as clear as day But during nighttime I lay awake, crying to a god unknown. I wish he would just walk me to his thrown. I want to get better But why cant i? They say you'll be ready, its just not your time. And this makes me ponder the matter, Is this why im a settler? Settle for what? I ask myself Seeing all black in my room but a white bookshelf. I cry in agony, im just so lost, how does one come out from under their own rock? I hide from the world, that must be it. I piece together all that I can fit. But those pieces are broken and chipped away. Some shattered, some rough, some hungry for my day. I pick them up, one by one. Piercing my skin to draw enough blood. I weep while i bleed, but it feels so good. I ask.. what am i doing?... and How did i shatter? How did i allow my mind to scatter? But i always drop the goddamn matter. Fuck this shit I really dont need this I repeat, while i write this thesis. My own life is my own, and i must drown before i can be shown, i swim to the surface and gasp for air. somewhere deep down, I know im so scared I dont want this darkness, But it lies to me, telling me I need to sleep, in his entities. With shakles around my feet and throat. I choke, and contine to blow this brutal smoke. I see the key to this happiness they say. I just dont reach for it because its so fucking far away. I give up to quickly, and it gets more tricky. and then, i drift into a snore.
All poems are copyright of the originating author. Permission must be obtained before using or performing others' poems.
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