<Deleted User> (6292)
Thu 26th Nov 2009 15:42
I have never written a Dear John letter but here goes
,Dear John,
Please be aware that this is a POEM please except that as read and written.
I understand from previous posts and comments that you have just completed your 2nd poem, and are coming hard and fast on the rails to catch up to your third not withstanding that you have undertaken an OU course on Poetry no less where they advise you to omit adjectives and avoid purple patches. Sounds good to me,
Good luck with your third.
Once again many thanks for your comments.
Augusta x
Comment is about John Aikman (poet profile)
Original item by John Aikman
<Deleted User> (7073)
Thu 26th Nov 2009 15:42
Hi, thank you for taking the time to read my poem and comment, I have always struggled to look poverty full square in the eye, I have worked in some deprived places too, Nigeria probably being the worst I will never get used to it. I am not keen on London either it is an unfriendly place from my experience, you should come to Wigan there is only the odd busker or two in the town centre ;-)) TC
Comment is about Beulah (poet profile)
Original item by Beulah
<Deleted User> (6292)
Thu 26th Nov 2009 14:52
Good afternoon,
Thank you so much for reading my poem and your generous comments. .
The question of honesty is a doubt throughout the poem, is the girl being honest with herself, her emotions are saying one thing her fear another and foremost her lust and sexual arousal quite another. The honesty of the writer is paramount and of course I am being honest many girls are placed or place them selves in this situation, between a rock and a hard place.
The writer in this instance was the young girl within the poem.
Once again many thanks for your honesty and comment..
Augusta x
Comment is about stephen smith (poet profile)
Original item by stephen smith
yea i know wat ya mean my problems are of a more smoked nature but same boat really, jese me freinds back home call me kealo haha coincidence!
Comment is about John Darwin (poet profile)
Original item by John Darwin
thanks Isobel. As usal there is more in the mortar than the pestle. Bet the young ones don't know that saying. Have two auditions coming up. Now if I get there then I have to get a part in one show at least. yeah.
Comment is about Isobel (poet profile)
Original item by Isobel
<Deleted User> (5646)
Thu 26th Nov 2009 12:38
Hi Andy, sorry but nothing showing up in the chat box. It might be my connection.
Text me if you like. :-)
Janet.x
Comment is about Andy N (poet profile)
Original item by Andy N
Kealo! Thanks for your comment on my Istanbul piece. I have something in common with those two poets and I don't mean my poetry.
Comment is about Kealan Coady (poet profile)
Original item by Kealan Coady
Marianne, thanks for your comment on 'drenched'. You are too kind. I yearn frequently :-)
Comment is about Marianne Daniels (poet profile)
Original item by Marianne Daniels
Anthony, thanks for your kind comments on my poem ''drenched'. It's the way it comes out. I can be quite cheerful in person :-)
Comment is about Anthony Emmerson (poet profile)
Original item by Anthony Emmerson
Hi Winston, thanks for your comment on 'drenched'. Did the second verse work better when heard?
John
Comment is about Winston Plowes (poet profile)
Original item by Winston Plowes
Hi Winston, thanks for your comment on 'drenched'. Did the second verse work better when heard?
John
Comment is about Winston Plowes (poet profile)
Original item by Winston Plowes
Thank you both for the welcome. My partner lost their Dad recently & the night I wrote this I had just lost my Great Aunt. I don't usually write so deep but it all just came out.
Comment is about Sue Hall (poet profile)
Original item by Sue Hall
Bringing up a child is a minefield and no-one gives you lessons - all you can rely on is your mum's example and not always that. I hope that when the time is right, you get her back. x
Comment is about Beulah (poet profile)
Original item by Beulah
there are so many pictures in Homing, a rich tapestry clearly written.
Comment is about pauline sewards (poet profile)
Original item by pauline sewards
Hello Sue. This is deep meaningful stuff. Can't wait to read some poems on here, welcome.
Comment is about Sue Hall (poet profile)
Original item by Sue Hall
<Deleted User> (7073)
Wed 25th Nov 2009 20:56
Hi John Thx for the heads up on 'Final Inspection' as you say it still is a good poem, and as valid today as when it was first written, but this site is about reviewing new work, so I have removed it. Cheers TC
Comment is about John Aikman (poet profile)
Original item by John Aikman
Hello Sue, your words struck a chord with me as I lost someone very close a couple of years ago. I feel that to enjoy our lives we have to jump in and go for it - you sound a very caring thoughtful person, but joy is, I think, as important as anything else in this world. So . . I hope you enjoy being part of WOL, and will write more - and that, indeed, it will be many many years before you get an answer to your questions! We're all in the same boat, and as you get older, that's a comfort.
Comment is about Sue Hall (poet profile)
Original item by Sue Hall
Rachel Bond
Wed 25th Nov 2009 19:12
I really like the poem 'Man was here' arresting , thought provoking and you read it well at Middleton...i hope you write more with similar theme. thanksx
Comment is about Katie Sheila Haigh (poet profile)
Original item by Katie Sheila Haigh
thanks for the lovely comments sian, havent written anything for a while and so you have urged me to pick up my pen once more. I love One Step Behind. Beautiful. take care x
Comment is about sian howell (poet profile)
Original item by sian howell
darren thomas
Wed 25th Nov 2009 13:30
Hi Sian - again, thanks for your comments. I'm not posting simply because I'm deep inside the forest of 'Old English' (and its verb structure) and covered in heaps of very dry learning. There will be a faint sound of rustling soon - I hope.
Take care - d
Comment is about sian howell (poet profile)
Original item by sian howell
Hi Ann, thanks very much for your comments on Sandy Denny and Andy Williams. I suppose I'm wistful only in the sense that she died far too young. I do agree that Who Knows Where The Time Goes is a wonderful song, and there are so many others too. Originally I had the idea of writing a whole sequence of poems about musicians I admired, but these two were as far as I got! Maybe when I take the redundancy ... Greg x
Comment is about Ann Foxglove (poet profile)
Original item by Ann Foxglove
Hi Cat,
thanks for taking the time to read and make comment on my work
steve x
Comment is about Cate (poet profile)
Original item by Cate
Hi Winston
thanks as ever for taking the time to read and make comment on my work
will of course consider the Haiku offer : )
steve x
Comment is about Winston Plowes (poet profile)
Original item by Winston Plowes
Hi Kealan
thanks for taking the time to read and make comment on 'Here'
steve x
Comment is about Kealan Coady (poet profile)
Original item by Kealan Coady
soemthing somwhere dies - i like this and you are right - tis more consistent this way - thanks
i tend only to leave stuff on here for comment for a short while - though i did/do appreciate your comment Cynthia
steve x
Comment is about Cynthia Buell Thomas (poet profile)
Original item by Cynthia Buell Thomas
Thank you for your kind words on my poem, 'That Tomorrow'. I am not quite reaching for the rope just yet. I remember reading something in the neww about bankers getting their fat bonus payouts and America spending daft money on the space programme.That got me thinking.and made me angry. Mankind needs reminding that there alot to prioritise and fight for.
That's me done on my soap box.
Comment is about Dave Bradley (poet profile)
Original item by Dave Bradley
Thank you for your kind words on my poem, 'That Tomorrow'. I am not quite reaching for the rope just yet. I remember reading something in the neww about bankers getting their fat bonus payouts and America spending daft money on the space programme.That got me thinking.and made me angry. Mankind needs reminding that there alot to prioritise and fight for.
That's me done on my soap box.
Comment is about Cynthia Buell Thomas (poet profile)
Original item by Cynthia Buell Thomas
<Deleted User> (5646)
Wed 25th Nov 2009 01:14
Hi Isobel,
i'm visiting wol for a few days. Got the loan of a mobile dongle but god it's so slow!!!!!!!
Just thought i'd pop in and say hi and hope you're well. :-)
Janet.x
Comment is about Isobel (poet profile)
Original item by Isobel
Freda, Hi... Re Pictures of home. I would love to see your thoughts on this one... very interesting. I am way beyond the stage now where I say " Oh no, you've got that all wrong... way wide of the mark" It's ok whether your interpretation is different to mine, it is just as valid. Just different. Critical or praiseworthy your comments will be gratefully received. Winston (See you on the 7th at the Puzzle) Win x
Comment is about Freda Davis (poet profile)
Original item by Freda Davis
Thanks for your kind comments on my "Apologies to..." poem. Don't think those are hob-nailed boots you're wearin' tho!
Comment is about Isobel (poet profile)
Original item by Isobel
Hi Kealan... Most welcome edit your poems and hit the tag line write in Gus Jonsson Group... and thats you... in
Welcome aboard.
Gus
Comment is about Kealan Coady (poet profile)
Original item by Kealan Coady
<Deleted User> (7073)
Tue 24th Nov 2009 19:47
Hello Ann again ;-)) I saw the comment's on your last poem what a great response !! I am glad you enjoyed the Solstace poem, otherwordly was it's intention ;-)) You can call me anything you like ha ha I have had a few variations !! however my real name when I am not hiding behind an alias is George ;-) By the way it was ME !! who spelled ' Rebellious ' incorrectly in your blog ha ha.......
G X
Comment is about Ann Foxglove (poet profile)
Original item by Ann Foxglove
Ty CBT, most welcome, as always.
Comment is about Cynthia Buell Thomas (poet profile)
Original item by Cynthia Buell Thomas
Hi Katie, ty for the comments. I think you say it succinctly. : )
Comment is about Katie Sheila Haigh (poet profile)
Original item by Katie Sheila Haigh
Hi KC, your ref' to the sigh has as its equivalent for me in the last line of 'The Trial' by Kafka.
Comment is about Kealan Coady (poet profile)
Original item by Kealan Coady
<Deleted User> (7075)
Tue 24th Nov 2009 15:32
Hi Pauline
welcome aboard.. Really enjoyed reading the poem 'Homing' a great rhythm and structure. Winston (New Members)
Comment is about pauline sewards (poet profile)
Original item by pauline sewards
<Deleted User> (7073)
Tue 24th Nov 2009 10:06
Hello Ann, I am sorry for your loss, there are so many people writing on here, its difficult to know someome until perchance they enter your consciouness, I thought 'Why can't I find a man who can dance?' lovely in its totality, yes you are right men do smell of oil and engines ;-)) we are all the same, I drill for the damn stuff. ha ha We seldom get time to dance, too busy being crushed by the wheels of life and it's obligations.
Keeping on dreaming and being you ;-)
George
Comment is about Ann Foxglove (poet profile)
Original item by Ann Foxglove
Hello Chris. Thank you for your comment on my dancing men poem. It's interesting that you enjoyed the first bit. I like the last bit, think the first bit is a meant-to-be cliche, and the two lines that join them are a bit rubbish - don't flow, too clunky, unless you say them in the right rythmn! I wrote the poem as a love letter to practical, scruffy, unassuming anorak type men, ( I used to work surrounded by them, in a previous existance) and the bit I think works for me are the last two lines. Or maybe the last three words!
Comment is about Christopher Dawson (poet profile)
Original item by Christopher Dawson
Hello! Just to apologise for not getting back to you - I keep forgetting to log off and falling asleep on the settee! Thank you for your kind words so far. I love this site! Have been made to feel at home and have read some great poems.
Comment is about Winston Plowes (poet profile)
Original item by Winston Plowes
Hi everyone!Hello Christopher. It's interesting that you enjoyed the first bit of my dancing men poem. I like the last bit, think the first bit is a meant-to-be cliche, and the two lines that join them are a bit rubbish - don't flow, too clunky, unless you say them in the right rythmn! I wrote the poem as a love letter to practical, scruffy, unassuming anorak type men, ( I used to work surrounded by them, in a previous existance) and the bit I think works for me are the last two lines. Or maybe the last three words!
Comment is about Ann Foxglove (poet profile)
Original item by Ann Foxglove
<Deleted User> (7073)
Tue 24th Nov 2009 00:11
Hello Cynthia thank you for your recent comments on my stuff ;-), my Sister tells me you are one of the nicest and most constructive people on here ;-)) Great !! you can carry on giving me tips and help me with the technical issues ensuing ha ha kindest regards George ( Mr Thaumaturgically Charged ha ha)
Comment is about Cynthia Buell Thomas (poet profile)
Original item by Cynthia Buell Thomas
Just came across your intensely interesting pieces, very glad I did....love the obvious natural ability you have and the level of layering within your work....such commitment to the written word, best I've seen. Sian X
Comment is about Marianne Daniels (poet profile)
Original item by Marianne Daniels
many many thanks for your kind comments Isobel, I am trying out a new style and I'm glad it seems to have hit the right note....to be honest I really wasn't sure I was going to even post it so there you go X
Comment is about Isobel (poet profile)
Original item by Isobel
<Deleted User> (5646)
Mon 23rd Nov 2009 21:33
Hi Cynthia,
just seen the lovely message you left on my profile at the end of last month. Thankyou.
Only here for a few days. A friend has loaned me a mobile dongle which surprisingly has allowed me to log in.
Janet.
Comment is about Cynthia Buell Thomas (poet profile)
Original item by Cynthia Buell Thomas
<Deleted User> (5646)
Mon 23rd Nov 2009 21:25
Hi Sian,
thanks for looking in on my profile. Haven't been on here for a month due to no internet service. This visit is temporary until full service can be resumed. (so to speak) :-)
ps. hope your latest blog isn't because of a bad personal experience. There are some unscrupulous fortune tellers around but they're not all bad.
Great poem.
Janet.
Comment is about sian howell (poet profile)
Original item by sian howell
I need a man who'll dance with me.
We'll meet in moonlight and I'll wear
a green gauze gown with pearls and opals in my hair.
He'll love me straight away, he'll be entranced
and then we'll dance.
I need a man who'll dance with me
and without effort he
will lift me up as in our mutual joy we twirl.
He'll write me poems, give me flowers perchance
and then we'll dance.
Enjoyed that, embraced it, so seldom can, good stuff!
Can we just leave it there though.
C.
Comment is about Ann Foxglove (poet profile)
Original item by Ann Foxglove
Cheers Nick. Glad you enjoyed it. Bloomdusk is a funny one. It's very Gothic and it contains a serious metaphor but the further I got writing it the more extreme it became. It ends up like a Hammer Horror theme. Funnily enough, I've just learned today that someone wants to do some artwork for the poem. That should be fun!
Comment is about Simon Rennie (poet profile)
Original item by Simon Rennie
steve mellor
Mon 23rd Nov 2009 19:32
Hi Isobel
It's ok, I met Chris last night, and I'm sure they wouldn't hit a sick man.
Now get down to some writing.
Comment is about Isobel (poet profile)
Original item by Isobel
Hi Chris the poems are on from last night, Man was here and Take.
Regards Katie
Comment is about Katie Sheila Haigh (poet profile)
Original item by Katie Sheila Haigh
<Deleted User> (7073)
Thu 26th Nov 2009 16:58
Wigan is around halfway up the M6, it gets a poor rep because the majority of the people who live there are hardworking, honest and friendly. Descended in the Main from gritty mine workers, millwrights, blacksmith’s and carpenters. In other words people familiar with integrity and community spirit, as oppose to the soft skinned pencil necked thieving pen pushers that seem to be rampant down South. ha ha I enjoyed that rant ;-))) The gas towers on the railway and ‘ The road to Wigan Pier’didn’t help though.TC X
Comment is about Beulah (poet profile)
Original item by Beulah