MAN TRAP

Snapped shut on the poacher's leg

the iron cage in its hide of bracken bites

with a dark declaration of blood

through a tangle of fustian,

matted hair jerked back with a brief cry,

a dead rabbit thrown clear by the shock.

 

He was spotted under an early sky

first by the beagle then the farmer.

Taken all but dead

back to the tack room on the estate

to survive with a limp.

         

In the pub a fire roars,

pints are pulled

and in the inglenook

there is the man trap in a coat of black

grinning with its shark jaw

forced into open retirement.

 

"It's part of the furniture now"

says the licensee to second homers,

embellishing its bloody history.

◄ SHIPPING FORECAST

SUMMER SEASON ►

Comments

Profile image

raypool

Mon 8th Jul 2019 20:20

Thanks Jason. Watch Straw Dogs to see one in action, pretty fearsome. They're outlawed these days but they do crop up, I spy 500 points at least.

That's a really fine like David thanks. The line I stumbled on , a sort of twist of early retirement ! Perversion of phrases often works for me. Glad it worked for you.

Mindy thanks for stopping and reading. You did well picking up that aspect, and I would think the landed classes were pretty hardy and used to dispatching animals , even embraced it (they might do again if given the chance).

Laura, what can I say ? A very useful exchange- thanks for that!

Thank you Eve, Lisa and Devon for liking this.

Profile image

Laura Taylor

Mon 8th Jul 2019 15:31

Sooo much better now!! That really works now without the eye being interrupted. Give the reader credit 😃

Profile image

Laura Taylor

Mon 8th Jul 2019 10:21

Ooo I do like this Ray. Great story.

Not quite understanding the reasoning behind the formatting of this bit though:


- 0 -

In the pub a fire roars,

<Deleted User> (22247)

Sun 7th Jul 2019 05:46

Terrific read. Smooth, subtle story-telling, especially the rescue scene with its calm retrospective manner.

Profile image

Wolfgar Miere

Sun 7th Jul 2019 05:23

Hello Ray,

I like the image "forced into open retirement" creates in my mind. Imagining it being cranked open (forced) as they extracted the poachers snapped body from it. Like tearing a rag doll from a Rottweilers jaws.

Then there it is displayed open on the Public House wall, as if a warning....the old customer limping to the bar...now that's poetry, creating a story which you didn't even write. Some should take note of the subtlety.

They won't.

David.

Profile image

Jason Bayliss

Sun 7th Jul 2019 00:16

I've seen quite a few of these over the years, I mean, not into double figures, but a few and never really thought about the story behind them. I will now. Excellent poem Ray.

J. x

If you wish to post a comment you must login.

This site uses cookies. By continuing to browse, you are agreeing to our use of cookies.

Find out more Hide this message