The envelope is stamped and addressed

But it hasn't made its way to my mailbox

I keep it safe in my nightstand drawer

To gawk and toil over during those

Introspective nights that offer

No escape from my thoughts

But my feelings

 

The seal is broken because

I couldn't stop myself from

Reading over it again

And again

And again

My soul poured on a page

My heart spelled out in ink

All there for you

 

And under the envelope

I keep my Blades

I keep my Escape

Behind each stroke of the pen is

A scar where nobody would notice

Every word hides another

Swallow of self-destruction

 

But I mean every sentence in those paragraphs

And I wish I had the guts to send it