Not Much Left to Lose Now
Everyone writes of the anguish of love and the pain it brings
Each of us believing no one will understand that sorrow
Of feather tattoos, secret kisses, and tragically lost rings
At some point that hope I clung to faded into tomorrow
To love with all the heart, despite humanity’s flaws
That was my choice to carry on and never say goodbye
The physical pain of a heart shredded by dreaded clause
“Forget about it,” “You two have fun,” and it’s me you vilify
I know what I’ve done but I am not much of a knight.
Half dozen times you pushed me away, walked away,
I’m not the soldier but I didn’t give up the fight
What about me must I change to make you stay?
Perhaps some battles are too filled with memory
Is it just me now? Honesty always has a price.
You do what you think is right but ignore my plea
You turn a deaf ear and think your solution will suffice
Guilt, that annihilator, destroyer of both of us,
At some point you gave up on the dream we cherished,
I know it’s my fault, I’m the one who is treasonous
I feel unlovable now, that hope of love has perished
Because of my past sins, I am forever in debt,
That clean slate will never be mine to own.
Whatever happens, my dear, I hope you don’t forget
That I love you for you and my heart is yours alone.