RITUAL

by ray pool

Friday 9th March 2018 10:58 pm

Just visible over gravel

through laurel is the road,

the squashy sound of tyres.

In front of the dressing table

he sits in underpants, socks, shirt

billowing open ready for gold links

and the fastening of a fly front.

The mirror confirms what he

has always known, that he would

reach a benchmark of unassailable

acceptance in lodges and clubs,

on common ground with others

on the way up.

Behind every successful man -

she is hoovering lightly to kill empty time.

At last he inspects the triumvirate of dress suit,

ruddy complexion and white carpet,

makes final adjustments,

reaches for the chain of office,

finally ready for the ball.

He wonders how long all this can last.

Comments

raypool

Tue 13th Mar 2018 16:56

Thanks Stu for your comparison! I checked out the lyrics - nice. Sad ending, and I think mine was trying to point out the basic pointlessness of arriving in a self important place.

Ray

Stu Buck

Mon 12th Mar 2018 16:50

great stuff as usual ray. reminded me of the song bill mccai by the coral.

'another day another gin his kids cant stand the sight of him'

raypool

Sun 11th Mar 2018 22:28

Hi Brian. Your'e right there, but I'd rather say that i'm not happy for him, as I don't subscribe to that way of life, so I portrayed him as more of a victim than he would consider himself. (poetic injustice).

HI David. Here is a dilemma: I invented him as both a mason and a mayor (is that possible); it seems rather logical to me, but not sure of the protocol. If he is both, his wardrobe must be sizeable. Either aspiration fits his type I reckon. Your assessment of stagnation is spot on IMO. But they wouldn't know that would they?

Thanks Martin. I laboured over details- I love the idea of semi dressing, as there is something faintly ridiculous in it, a sort of intrusion of honesty into a farce.

Cheers Suki. Glad you enjoyed that line, which was like a big interruption in the thought pattern. I know quite a few masons (a la family)and have found them pretty much self seeking with a soupcon of hypocrisy thrown in . I have tried a bit of amdram, and I know it can inflate the ego betimes.

Thanks additionally Col and Pat for the likes.

Love to all. Ray

suki spangles

Sun 11th Mar 2018 03:44

Hi Ray,

The emptiness of the ritual; climbing the greasy pole. "The lodges", allusion to the freemasons, and all their weirdness. It's Groundhog Day for them both:

she is hoovering lightly to kill empty time..

Brilliant line, Ray.

Suki

Martin Elder

Sat 10th Mar 2018 18:07

A thought provoking piece this one Ray. I agree with David in as much as this sounds very masonic to me. Most of all I love the attention to detail here
Nice one

<Deleted User> (18980)

Fri 9th Mar 2018 23:00

He has achieved his aim but doesn't seem happy.

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RITUAL

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