all the feelings shoot through me at a hundred miles per hour straight to the brain. BOOM. consumed. it feels like someone else takes over for a moment. this person is filled with rage pulls at my hair, wants to slice open my skin and scream to the heavens "why do i even exist let me drop dead". all of these thoughts come to mind. poison poison poison. thats all they are to me. once i come back to my body i feel guilty and embarresed for how i behaved and what i thought. this is the cycle im fighting to break. one day at a time.