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Some Lie and Some Die

entry picture

it started innocently enough


a wild and wet night in Bradford

cinema crowd emerges, disperses

collars up, umbrellas up

dashing for cars

hands out for buses and taxis


there she is 

kissing friends goodbye

and walking

hurrying

handbag clutched tight


the car 

windscreen wipers on full

passes 

slowly

and stops


d'ya need a lift, love? where ya goin'? 

come on, jump in, you look drenched

umm....OK......thanks


his smile 

her relief

warmth

he's a nice bloke, like one of Dad's mates 

I'm Ken, well, Kenny actually


.....listening to Marvin all night long.....


like Spandau Ballet do ya?

all smiles

soon have you home

ahh, low on fuel, I'll find a garage

won't take a minute

 

where are we? I thought you said.....


.....dissolve the nerves that have just begun.....


just a little kiss, come on love,

just a little kiss for Kenny, 

don't struggle love, 

come on, relax, I'm not going to hurt you....


see, that's nice isn't it?


no no, no, please, no..........


no-one can hear you, love

just relax

don't struggle

or.....


.....why do I find it hard to write the next line?.....

◄ Edward Burra: The Snack Bar (1930)

Haiku: Whiffy Communication ►

Comments

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Paul Waring

Sun 12th Feb 2017 10:29

Thanks Jeff. I don't like the word either.

Paul

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Jeff

Sun 12th Feb 2017 06:57

Haunting & happens every week......slightly off topic but I really hate the word "grooming" as when I see dog groomers I just smile, which isn't right....Jeff....

Frances Macaulay Forde

Sat 11th Feb 2017 02:44

Atmospheric. Loved how we moved from father-like concern to threatening promise... Well done.

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Paul Waring

Fri 10th Feb 2017 11:35

Thanks Stu, great comment, I'm so pleased that this piece has been so well received by you and all the others who have kindly read and commented.

Paul

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Stu Buck

Fri 10th Feb 2017 09:47

very powerful and the last line is revalatory, a breaking of the fourth wall, a meta-slap to the cheeks of the reader.

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Paul Waring

Fri 10th Feb 2017 09:35

Ha-ha-ha, ha-ah-hi

Thank you for the additional material, Col... evil swines like this deserve every kick in the ging-gangs.

I know this much is true.

Paul

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Paul Waring

Fri 10th Feb 2017 09:20

Thanks Raj, what a lovely compliment you have paid about the accessibility of my writing. I'm most grateful. My coffee suddenly tastes richer and smoother - right, let the people watching commence! ?

Paul

<Deleted User> (13762)

Fri 10th Feb 2017 08:26

aaargh!
You bitch!
Give me the keys back!
Who are you phoning?

The police you fucking pervert

No, no, don't do that
Look I'll drive you home
Pretend nothing ever happened
How much you want?

Shut the fuck up or I'll kick you in the bollocks again

...Oh I want the truth to be known...

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Raj Ferds

Fri 10th Feb 2017 07:49

Your poems never fail to engage the reader Paul. I find them so, so accessible.

This one has drama, suspense and hey it's bloody scary.

Keep them coming!

Raj

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Paul Waring

Thu 9th Feb 2017 22:57

Ray, I may have already said everything in my response to your comment about 'The Snack Bar'. Once again, I thank you for every ounce of encouragement, I am so grateful to you. BTW, my partner was quite startled when I read this piece out loud, maybe that's a sign it would potentially be a good live read!

Ray, aythangyow so very much.

Paul

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raypool

Thu 9th Feb 2017 21:36

Everyone's nightmare Paul, and Bradford just makes it worse. One for a live reading this. Please make steps, it can be addictive.

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Paul Waring

Thu 9th Feb 2017 20:10

Thank you so much Louise.

I'm so pleased you liked it and I really appreciate your comments.

Paul

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Louise Hogg

Thu 9th Feb 2017 18:43

Brilliant.
Made my hackles stand on end. Really powerful.

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Louise Hogg

Thu 9th Feb 2017 18:43

Brilliant.
Made my hackles stand on end. Really powerful.

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