******Mild Adult Content**********

 

 

It happened too quick, I was laid in bed

Skin tightened up, garrotted the head

Said to the Ex "look at that... Gawd blimey"!

Best get to the Docs, looks like dried calimari

 

I said I'd leave it , being a man

Mistake, mistake, said the ambulance man

Thought it was ok to fiddle with it

Couldn't get it back over....Jesus!...oh shit!  

 

I said to the doc I've a dodgy collar

Nurse said it looks like a penis, only smaller

Urologist  arrived said it looks horrific 

Whip out me scalpel......terrific!

 

Doc mentioned dryly, & my eye a tear shed  

Once was  a Cavalier,  soon to be Roundhead 

It's a simple procedure, he said "get a grip!"

I am, I will...hope it'll be quick!

 

Where once a flesh collar sat proud on  me porridge gun

Now aesthetically  pleasing? more like a prawn volovant!!

I was thirty when I lost me protective glandular wrap

Now the end is like an old  leather watch strap 

 

The day they took me foreskin