Don't think this is even a poem! It came about after I talked to what can only be described as, 'a hipster' who informed me that ,'tea is the new coffee'. Good to know, better start to stockpile it before the price rockets.

 

 

 

Hey Hipster, please leave tea alone.

You’ve had our coffee, beards and our seedy streets down the back of Shudehill.

So, with respect, fuck off and leave tea alone.

 

You are cosied and cosseted like the pot with leaves

and strainer and china cups

and redundant bric a brac from yesteryear.

Please Hipster, pick up your monocle

 get on your penny ‘fucking’ farthing and leave our tea alone.

 

Hipster, go back to the colony you’ve created

Which incidentally, is neither a quarter of anything or particularly northern.

Go and discuss Proust over fresh ground and uncover new ground

On Kant. You kant.

But leave tea alone!

 

A working class panacea, that I fear

Will go the way of craft beer, drain pipe jeans

And the symbol that signifies quite clear

That round here we deal in pounds and pence and not nonsense.

So Hipster, please, fuck off and please leave tea alone.