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The Hike

 
                            Air as fresh as morning pierces our skin, 

                        as the sun begins its own voyage up the sky

                    Breezes fill the open space and paw at the green

                and the trees stand timeless and high


            Hills laugh at us, making no notion to abrade

        as our footsteps are heavy and sigh

    Dangerous roads rebel against our feet

Thin rope railings stretch towards the sky


The waterfall roars its mighty breath

    and spits when it speaks to the clay

        The creek whispers its secrets to the rocks,

            which are written of years of what those waters say


                Fallen trees applaud us now

                    for completing their clever maze

                        Home smiles and calls out to us

                            and we dream of doing it again one day

The Wind's Betrayal ►

Comments

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ali bell

Mon 13th Jul 2015 01:05

Thanks for the feedback!
I appreciate the kind words and advice.

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Graham Sherwood

Sun 12th Jul 2015 11:16

There are some really nice ideas in this piece Ali (including the arrow). I particularly liked the fallen trees applauding your ability to pick your way through them and the rocks written by the words of the creek. Some great images.

<Deleted User> (13762)

Sun 12th Jul 2015 08:36

Hi Ali, I really like the way this resembles an arrow waymarking a trail or footpath. Whether intentional or not, adding and subtracting a few words would make it clearer. Thanks for posting.

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