I died inside

I'm just tryna get on,
Don't ask for much,
As much I have,
With good family and friends,
I don't do to bad,
But there's a feeling of emptiness deep inside,
I'm keepin it quiet, but inside I've died,
I don't like to share the failure I feel,
For a glimpse of hope, I would beg, borrow, steal,
Tears keep rolling from my blue blue eyes,
I'm keepin it quiet, but I've died inside,
All feelings have left me, alone, that I am,
I scavenge my soul for a glimmer that can,
Revive me, alive me, awaken my mind,
Give me the passion I need to survive,
I don't like this feeling me dying inside,
So what do I do? I ask every day,
Crawl on the floor, give in and lay,
On this bed of self pity and worthless intent,
I wasn't born for this, it's not meant,
I reach in the darkness with my very last fight,
And a miracle, it seems, a flicker of light,
A low golden twinkle and gentle appeal,
My heart beat gets stronger, my feelings.... I feel,
This is all I need, I did not realise,
My reason for living is in my childs eyes.
How selfish and cruel when my feelings re root,
The depression subsides, time for the boot,
I must start again, my eyes cry once more, 
My soul has a warmth, I have felt before,
So I pick myself up again from the hollow,
And I pray that these thoughts will not dare to follow,
Because,
I have a gentle soul and at times very weak,
But I find when I write I don't have to speak,
And this is my prompt, my will to survive,
I didn't like that feeling of dying inside.

◄ The Shame

Beautiful creatures ►

Comments

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Tina Ford

Sun 23rd Nov 2014 17:13

Thank you Philip, I will take a look xxx

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Tina Ford

Wed 19th Nov 2014 14:24

Hi Patricia & Stefan, thank you very much. I appeciate your words xx

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Patricia and Stefan Wilde

Wed 19th Nov 2014 12:06

Hi christina-apart from the fact that this is a subject of heartfelt sadness-
it really is a great poem.
we loved it-if loved is the right word?xx

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Tina Ford

Tue 18th Nov 2014 22:39

hahahaha just the way i felt at the time Solar Winds. Thank you for the comment :D

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Rose Casserley

Tue 18th Nov 2014 21:56

died inside? no way! this poem is written by somebody(you of course Tina..;0))very much alive!

brilliant writing-
so stop duffing yourself up!x

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