The Ballad of Jack McGee (based on the TV show "The Incredible Hulk")
by Alain English

My name is Mr Jack McGee
I'm a journalist by trade

The paper that I write for
Is very widely read

We've published many stories
Of a controversial slant

But the story that I have to tell
Is one we couldn't print

I was in Culver, years ago
Writing up a robbery

The locals had some stories
That intrigued and excited me

A camper said he'd seen a monster
Lurking by the river

The creature was of human shape
Only it was ten times bigger

The face was ugly, fierce and wild
It roared at him in anger

The camper fled in terror from it,
Scared he was in danger

It wasn't the most plausible
Of stories that I've heard

But the man seemed reasonable and sane
I took him at his word

The camper showed me evidence
A huge footprint in the dirt

An abandoned car was lying close by,
The shell was crushed and bent

I followed the road for half a mile
To a building in the hills

I saw a couple talking outside,
Standing by the doors

The couple were two scientists,
Elaine and David Banner

I asked them just couple of questions,
Looking for an answer

But I all got was blank denial,
Keeping me at bay

They tried their best to close me down
And make me go away

But I had a funny feeling,
A reporter's intuition

I can tell when someone's lying
And concealing information

I waited til the time was right
Then snuck inside the building

I wanted to observe them 
And see what they were doing

I got a little look inside
A cavernous laboratory

With graphs, charts and monitors
Everywhere before me

With all of it in disarray
The room looked such a mess

With upturned chairs and tables,
Splintered wood and broken glass

I ventured in, I heard a yell
Then someone grabbed my elbow

The two of them had seen me enter,
Watching from the shadows

David Banner gripped my arm
And threw me back outside

I knew then there was something
He was really keen to hide

I asked him straight up "What's the deal?"
He raised his arm and warned me

"Don't make me lose control.
You wouldn't like me when I'm angry."

I took the hint and backed away
Ready to retreat

And that was when the two of us
Were blasted off our feet

The science building was on fire
Flames were racing through it

And Banner scrambled to his feet
And rushed off back inside it

The flames were getting higher
And the heat was just unbearable

I stumbled off, looked back
And then I saw something...incredible

A ten-foot green-skinned creature
Walking through the flames

Growling, snarling furiously
The woman in his arms

I couldn't move from staring
At this truly awesome sight

The Hulk let out a roar and then
Raced off into the night

The girl was found a few hours later
Lying in the woods

There was no life left in her,
She had perished from her wounds

The cops interrogated me,
Checking out the matter

Of the death of both the woman
And her partner David Banner

He burnt to death inside the lab
As he came to her rescue

His body gone without a trace,
Lost in the inferno

The cops just shook their heads
When I informed them of the creature

It was the Hulk that caused the fire - 
This thing committed murder

It didn't matter who I told
No-one would believe it

But I knew the Hulk was real
And I was going to prove it

The Hulk just didn't disappear
He kept on turning up

As a mysterious and violent force
That nobody could stop

I tracked the Hulk across the land
Wherever someone saw it

I took a tranquiliser gun,
Hoping to subdue it

I chased the Hulk for many years
The more that I pursued him

The more I came to know his plight
The more I understood him

I was cornered one time
By a gangster with a knife

The Hulk showed up and took him down
The creature saved my life

I learned then that the creature
Was not completely evil

But more than that, I learned the Hulk
Was actually two people

A single man who walked the roads
And moved from place to place

Forced to hide the angry Hulk
Behind a human face

The Hulk was always on my mind
It maddened and it tortured me

I had to find the Hulk and trap him,
Learn his true identity

My grand obsession with this creature
Tore apart my marriage

To keep a loving home life going 
Was more than I could manage

My colleagues all made fun of me
For following the Hulk

My editor thought I was nuts,
A total laughing stock

He told me "Kill this story, Jack,
It's totally ridiculous"

"You're throwing your career away -
Let it go - I'm serious."

I pinned my hopes upon the Hulk
To salvage my career

But there were times I got depressed
And fell into despair

But I stayed strong, I knew deep down
Just what I had to do

Determination drove me on
To see this story through

I was in the town of Wilmington -
There'd been another sighting

My paper redirected me 
Towards a nearby shooting

The town airport was under siege
Some terrorists had captured it

The army had the place surrounded
Hell-bent on retaking it

I took a chance, and quickly slipped
Behind the battle lines

Inside, some hostages were gathered,
Fearing for their lives

Amid the sound of gunfire,
There was panic and confusion

As something unexpected happened
Causing a commotion

The Hulk emerged, as if from nowhere,
Crashing through a wall

His size, ferocity and power
Mesmerized them all

The terrorists made their retreat
And quickly fled the building

The Hulk gave chase and followed them,
Snarling and growling

A plane was waiting for the gang,
They all soon climbed aboard it

The Hulk just kept on running
As he made his way toward it

The plane rolled down the runway
As it's turbine engines flaired

The savage grabbed a wing
As it took off into the air

A gunman fired upon the Hulk,
Some bullets hit the engine

The Hulk was thrown into the sky
Caught up in the explosion

He landed hard upon the ground
The impact made a crater

I made my way to find
The stricken body of the creature

The Hulk lay there completely still
And then began to change

Reverting to his human form
I recognised his face

A man I long believed was dead
The scientist David Banner

The realization dawned on me 
With sadness and with horror

His flickering eyes snapped open
He looked up and said to me

"The Hulk is finally destroyed
It's finished now - I'm free"

The Army gathered round
And carried Banner's corpse away

I stood back, completely stunned
Not knowing what to say

I got back to my office
And I found a message for me

An order from the government
To never print my story

I punched the wall in anger
This was simply too upsetting

All my pursuits and all my struggles - 
All of it - for nothing!

I settled down eventually
Coming to my senses

I didn't want to risk my job
I knew the consequences

I wondered home alone that night
Whistling in the dark

And shed a tear in memory 
Of the man they called the Hulk.