Beyond Doubt

Calling the familiar ray,

hope bore a light,

unlike any star, 

for while its brilliance

scattered and shone

over all we could see,

its longevity was called into question

so it dissipated within its doubt. 

Still the echo of its ghost

remains primal in its protection

of those who seek it, 

as beyond the chilling

despondency of doubt, 

all we are and will be remain

ever hopeful.

 

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Comments

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Patricia and Stefan Wilde

Wed 10th Sep 2014 13:03

long time,no read!tis indeed good to see you back Josh.Love this poem.xx

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Cynthia Buell Thomas

Wed 10th Sep 2014 10:24

Good to hear back from you, Josh. I really like the comments under your profile, because I totally agree with them.

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Cynthia Buell Thomas

Tue 9th Sep 2014 11:07

The intent of these words is excellent, clear and rich. The directing of these ideas with so much punctuation is awkward. I do think you have three basic sentences. Let them breathe. IMO, if in doubt, leave out.

Also, IMO, pick 'dampening' or 'despondency'. Me, I like 'despondency' with 'dampening' inherent in its effect, and it sounds better in this context. :) I'm really not bossy, just interested.

It's really great to see you on-line again. I hope you are well, and happy.

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