Vodka

by Marianne Daniels

Wednesday 23rd October 2013 2:56 pm

Dribbling down

my world half eaten by the running

sound of water in my brain -

there is some thought invested

wrong.

It is furious

for those women that cackle

in my make-up bag;

picking them out one by one,

to rub their tenderness on my skin

where it flakes off in places.

A mirror is mistaken;

the wrong side of a hemisphere

connected to the shaving

quality of this water.

I hold it up into the light;

the trickle of human perception,

a narcotic willing.

Then a He, He gives me reasons -

Dionysian slick

test tubes of an elixir,

pinched sweet in a kiss;

the plump of my lip,

sexed

as if I stand behind a waterfall

with each face I know -

the tip of a glass

and the pour of a bottle.

Comments

Marianne Louise Daniels

Wed 21st May 2014 11:14

Thanks for your time Dominic.

I post a small sample of the work that I write up here and most of the time it is just for the exercise and so few are not as finely tuned as I would like a final draft to be. Nevertheless, I leave them up because I view my blog as a writing scrap book of sorts. Think this is an example of a time when my writing's purpose was to click and clack.

The stuff am writing now is very different.

Thank you for your considered comment. x

Dominic James

Wed 21st May 2014 11:04

Great last stanza. As with the others, Vodka has that vital mental immediacy that really touches off your poems. Some others, and this might be projection on my part, or my own tin ears, ask for editing of content, and for sound, but like, I think, the last commentator on Raven, I'd spend more time on your poems before suggesting an example. It is all very good writing.

Marianne Louise Daniels

Thu 24th Oct 2013 11:17

Hello! thank you for reading.

Tommy - I was sober when I wrote this and no I didn't use a cut up method. I don't ever use that - these are all my own words and sentences that have been written in the flow of the idea!

Thank you Cynthia! x

Cynthia Buell Thomas

Thu 24th Oct 2013 11:04

Marianne, this is superb. Talk about acing the use of 'subterfuge'. Such master crafting of word and line to express your ideas.

Tommy Carroll

Thu 24th Oct 2013 09:08

HI Ms Daniels :)Is this work written during the effects of drink/drugs? or cut-up? or ...? Tommy

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Vodka

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