It's been so long I'd forgotten.
"Ups and downs" can hardly describe
The abyss that greets each lacklustre word,
The endless self-analysis,
The whining and whinging that only serve
To push you still further toward indifference.

My fantasies have crashed headlong,
Breaking on the spindle point
As hope skids eternal back and forth,
Each up, each down, a mountain peak
Unyielding, but still the climb is urgent
And the prize beyond imagining.