"James Bond Went Wrong" (Ken Loach directed Bond film I wrote for)

 

 

James Bond Went Wrong

 

James Bond signed on

Sacked every assignment 

Official secrets ink marked 

Confirmed didn't give a toss

There's a job at supermarket 

Arranged interview appointment 

 

"Can you tell me about yourself 

 Using STAR interview method?"

James Bond went wrong 

"That system was created

 The year after Dr. No

 Infiltrated management next century so 

 It demonstrates problem solve

 Because most of all you're hands off

No management needed model employed"

Interview terminated because car theft

Attempt resulted in explosion and car stunt

 

James Bond went wrong

Going into local pub

Asking for a shandy

Laughter then questioning 

From patrons threat of handy 

James Bond asked if able

To do card games on a table

Instead of football screen

No laughter instead dismissive scream

 

James Bond got a phone

In a shop actually bought

Didn't understand a word

Assistant said once

Just stared into distance 

Where a display case 

James Bond's reflection met

"Hello, this is James Bond 

 My new mobile number phone"

The seasons pass and contract 

With energy supplier monster

James Bond his phone rang

He'd missed another Jobcentre appointment 

 

James Bond in charity shop

Treated contempt by customers

Tried lighting on cigarette break 

Using laser from watch

Next door, that pub right?

No longer satellite caught

 

James Bond Justice Court One

"Because sample only negative 

 All charges dropped if with M connect!"

James Bond got job

And has messaged on his account 

"Congratulations! Well done!"

The season at last 

James Bond's signed back on

But in this exact time

Went on the sick done

Holidays of motionless 

While glistening women sing:

 

"James Bond! You haven't saved the world!

Just stood on head while convincing Earth

That everything bad got under control 

And kept a target symbolising evolve 

When offering exact opposite involve

Because establishment will enfold 

Trying keeping theft revolves

Around expecting flag could talk

Go back to bed James Bond saves

And nothings wrong or going on

WHY DID YOU MENTION?!!

THINGS COULD GO WRONG?!!

Wasn't that agreement 

When doing as told

How far out from own fingertips

What year did you say it starts 

What's the point of decoding message

That's how James Bond 

Kept it from

And targeted others signing on"

 

Well done 07 Bond country delivered 

Identities logged.

 

🌷(2)

JamesBond

◄ Knowledge and Death In The Calculator State

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