My eyes open, I'm awake. The soft unpleasant glow of light terrifies me. Is it that time?

I can't discern any shapes in the room. I cough, the air is filled with the aroma of stale beer and cigarettes.

I roll over and rip the sheets over my head, in attempt to defy time. I cannot bring myself to look at the clock, I am too depressed to wake up, and too driven to die.

I just need those sweet, blissful couple of minutes of sleep, which inevitably does nothing. Anxiety ridden, I check my phone, and two minutes until my alarm. I fall asleep, somehow.

The beeping of my alarm goes off, giving me an instant headache. That apocalyptic drone, signaling my trance induced march to the end of all happiness.

I crumble and submit to the morning. I cautiously put my glasses over my swollen face, to reveal the depressing state of my room. The ashtray overflowing with cigarette butts, avoiding the empty beer cans littering the floor, as if they were landmines.

Stumbling down the stairs, with a head heavy enough to shatter through the floor. I promise myself, I'm done living like this, this is no way to live.

I open the door to my sad car. Scratches and dents are the buick's tattoos and scars that I inadvertantly gifted.

I light my first cigarette of the day as I turn onto the street. Heavy winds, brown and yellow leaves falling into cyclones. On the highway, I exceed the speed limit, I'm going to be late for work.

I ash my cigarette out of my window, but the ember falls between my legs. I scramble and scrape frantically at the cherry fire burning my thighs, head tilted down, mind distracted. My eyes flash sharply above the dashboard just too late.....................

The soft unpleasant glow of light terrifies me. Is it that time? My alarm is going off.