Too Tall Tool by LADpoem

I wonder just how many people

think that it's ok

to comment on a person's height

having only met that day.

Coz so far I have noticed

that there seems to be a rule

that you can say just what you want

if someone's 6ft 7 tall.

 

"Oh my god how tall are you?"

I regularly hear

from rude insensitive people

when I'm out for a casual beer.

Now what if I replied by saying 

"how much do you weigh?"

or " crikey you are ugly

   have you always looked that way?".

 

Sarcastic shouts of "watch your head" 

a million times I've heard it,

still it's only me the lanky freak

so I probably just deserve it.

Surely this must be an 'ism'

in the world we live today!

or is it only things 

like race and sex that count that way?

 

Coz if someone's gender neutral 

and their name is Bill or Kim, 

you would lose your job and livelihood

if you called them "her" or "him"

But because I'm 6ft 7 

even though we've never met,

a wounding undesirable remark

is  the only thing I get.

 

I wasn't born inside a growbag

and I don't play basketball.

I don't experience different weather

to a man who's 5ft tall.

And don't assume my decorating skills

could win me an award,

that's like saying someone small is good 

at painting skirting boards.

 

In a supermarket aisle 

when out shopping for my tea,

I'l often hear "excuse me

can you reach up there for me?"

I'd like to tell them to do one,

yeah I'd love to see their faces,

after all they wouldn't ask

Somebody small to tie their laces.

 

Buying clothes should be quite simple

it's just a choice of fit and style

but for me at 6ft 7

well it's gonna take a while.

If I'm prepared to pay a premium

I can get longer legs and sleeves,

yet a guy who's 5'11 

just buys off the peg and leaves. 

 

If I enter any shoe shop 

there's another thing I hate,

"available in 6-12"

they confidently state. 

There's no will or obligation

to supply for feet like mine,

unless I log on to the internet

and order them online.

 

When I travel on an aeroplane 

there's no legroom in my seat,

yet the space is for a human,

a criteria I meet.

 

In a restaurant if a vegetarian 

couldn't choose a main 

they'd ask to see the manager

and rightly would complain,

or if sadly you're disabled

and you need to use the loo,

there will be a special toilet

that's available just for you.

 

When I went to Alton Towers

and excitedly arrived,

I was told because I'm tall 

I couldn't go on all the rides,

so instead of the Oblivion 

or the dreaded Tower of hell,

I paid 130 big ones 

just to ride the carousel. 

 

When I book a posh hotel room

and I go to get in bed,

it is clear they are expecting 

 Someone 5ft 6 instead,

or if I go to take a shower 

in a bid to smell my best,

it's not easy when the shower fixing 

lines up with my chest.

 

In a car when I am driving

I can barely move my knees,

Yet nearly everybody else jumps  in

and pulls away with ease.

 

Imagine eating in a restaurant

or drinking in a bar 

and being instantly harassed

because of just how tall you are.

Imagine walking past a waiter

and getting more than just a glance,

or being stared at from all angles

if you choose to have a dance.  

 

Imagine being sad and single

and your self esteem's a mess 

and knowing that your stature

is unlikely to impress,

and when you finally find the courage

to approach a girl you see,

she literally looks at you in horror

 and says "you're way too tall for me".

 

Imagine looking at your Daughters 

when you tuck them in at night

and knowing all the family

hope they haven't got your height.

 

So it isn't wrong to think it

of course I know I'm very tall

but if ever we should meet

just don't remind me that is all!.