Am I losing it?

searches are scarier lately,

Trying to find a way out.

I couldn't had been more petty,

Been listening to the sound of crickets,

All I could remember are rickets in my life.

But what history has ever changed?

 

I feel like I have been here before,

Subtle signs at a young age,

Just the same page with a different number.

Can't tell the storyline perfectly,

Some words and actions are repetitive.

Trying to push a knife through the chest,

"it's enough now". 

Check the progress,

It has advanced since last time.

Fetch my memories; they seem darker than I remember.

 

It's been like this,

Look in the mirror,

And picture a dark version of me.

Deeper that I find are masked suicides,

Waiting for the mask to wear off.

Shed a tear once more,

And swing on that branch.