I have been writing poetry seriously for about 6 years. Here is my CV: Writing Magazine: 3 first prizes, 1 second prize, shortlisted 8 times, published 4 times. Fire River Poets: first prize, published on their website Sentinel Literary Quarterly: second prize, publication Grist Chapbook competition: shortlisted Wakefield Red Shed: second prize Deddington Festival competition: shortlisted Nottingham Poetry Society competition: merit prize Penfro Open Poetry: commended. Kingston Libraries competition: 3rd prize Creative Writing Ink Prizewinner Torriano Poetry: highly commended Also published by Earlyworks Press, Strong Verse, Forty20 (yeah, the rugby league magazine!), Southport Fringe Poetry Most of these will appear if you google Bill Lythgoe poems
Maybe Descartes Got It Wrong I am therefore I think. I awake therefore I stop dreaming. I have eyes therefore I see. I itch therefore I scratch. God does not exist therefore I don’t believe in her. I am a law-abiding citizen who likes to relax therefore I drink alcohol occasionally to excess, whatever that might mean. I am a senior citizen therefore I remember events that never occurred. I am a rational being therefore I notice that the world is run by madmen. I sometimes have doubts about my own sanity therefore I have never consulted a psychiatrist. I am a poet therefore I am aware of the relevance of red wheelbarrows. I am alive therefore I shall witness the dying of the light. Bargain Basement I stand and wait outside the gates of hell. A sign suggests they might not let me in: NO ACCESS FOR UNLICENSED PERSONNEL. A female demon’s finger strokes my chin. She licks her lips, “How may I help you, please?” “Er, well, I’ve come down here to sell my soul.” She says, “I need to list our USPs: our clients’ satisfaction is our goal. We follow health and safety guidelines here, we’re registered abroad – no tax to pay. Our special offer: sign up for a year and you’ll be Poet Laureate for a day.” “Sounds good,” I say, “but I’ve heard better from your rivals at beelzebub.com.”
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