Hi Anthony, hope you're well and don't want to place you under any pressure but wanted to say you are missed.

Janet.x

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Thank you all for the comments on 'Hog'. I thought I would explain a little about it, I hope this is of interest to you! Firstly, as for almost all that I write this was completed swiftly, in no more than 10 minutes or so. The only revision made was swapping two of the lines in the second stanza. I like to write like this it feels natural, I am not a ponderer over a sheet of paper I believe in intuitive and impulsive writing. I think this is where the best work comes from. This means of course that it is usually flawed, as this poem undoubtedly is! The idea for the poem was simply that Dylan Thomas had stolen more than his share from the 'genius gene pool' - I should explain that I am of Wesh parentage although I was not born there - leaving none for anyone else, and me in particular! The first verse is just a superficial portrait of Thomas, his appearance, his drinking and smoking (stubs here is a reference to his fingers, not a cigarette stub) - and the delivery of his poetry when he read it. If you listen to recordings his delivery is very theatrical and sounds very much of the time that it was done; dated to modern ears.

The second stanza (understandably criticised by some of you) is part reference to the location of the Boat House his residence in Laugharne and partly my own memories of summers spent as a boy In Wales. My relationship with Wales is one of love and awkwardness. Stake a claim to Welshness in England is often met by ridicule, do the same in Wales in an English accent and the result can be the same! I like to think that this somehow comes across in the second verse. The alliteration is obvious and probably overused I can see why come may not like it.

In the second stanza I was also trying to use words for their sound purely, I like the para-rhyme of somnambulant and ambient, drunkenness and genius.

Finally I did write 'hog' whilst drinking which may explain the good and the bad in it also.

I hope you liked my explanation.

Best Wishes.

John

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Hi Anthony,
glad to see you back and hope you had a good rest. Thanks for comment on Kinsella.
You'll find the previous entry in the August blogs or click on my profile and into other blogs then August. A bit of a trek i know.. :-)
As for the inspiration for it, well that's something i think a mind like yours will identify with.

Janet.x

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Hi Anthony
Thanks for your comment, and I can honestly say that I wasn't upset by it, but it was a bit like being back at school, where I was originally put off literature. If you read my Biog. it says that I write for my own pleasure .....
What's written in Time Flues is exactly what I wanted to say, at the time it was written. Whether it's good, bad or indifferent, it's what I wanted to say.
I shall leave the site to those more serious poets, and those desirous of improving.

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Thanks for your comments Anthony. Loved Edge - not dissimilar themes really. Must get round to reading more of yours.

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Hello again!
Just wanted to say thanks for the time that you have spent reading and critiquing my poem 'No love lost here'.
It's amazing to see how different and punchier (!) it feels with the edit. I really like the way it has been edited too-it flows better. i'm at an open mic in Manchester on thurs so I'm gonna get practising!
Cat x

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Hi anthony

thanks again fro your comments and advice on my latest blog. I spotted a couple of typos and changed a word or two, I wouldn't mind you having another read and see if it's better or whether you would further edit - I've always shied away from editing my own stuff!

Cheers
Cat x

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hit the nail on the head there, i tend to just write never really think about why...so thanks

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Hi Anthony, thanks for your comment on Our Gramps. I took you and Janet up on your suggestion to put it to music, and wrote a tune in the middle of last night for it! {Dont you just hate it when the muse strikes you at 4 in the morning} I might get round to singing it at the Tudor sometimes!
Cate xx

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Hi there,
Thank-you for reading and commenting on Shhh - if I tell you - I'm glad you liked it, it's cos I am. ;-)
Cx

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Dear me - drugs, sex, rock and roll seem to have passed me by in Ibiza - how sad is that? Forgot your stick of rock - will have to go back there. Any suggestions on my new poem welcome. Thanks. Isobel x

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Anthony thanks mate for your comments on "Imagine"
Bernie

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hi AE thank you for that observation. I concur!

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Who's opened his Christmas crackers early....mmmmm

Thanks for reading AE
Gus

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Hi Anthony, it's about time you up-dated your profile. It was getting to be hard work finding you down there in the dungeons. :-)

Love the ''Edge'' poem in your samples.

Janet.x

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Thanks for my welcome home! Yes, I was surprised to hear a few Northern vowels in your accent. I am the same - have spent most of my life away from the North, but never lost the accent from my formative years - just the 'lewk, bewk' sound cos I got sick of people taking the mick. Loved your new poem, as did my sis, who was discussing it with me this morning...
Isobel x

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Thankyou Anthony and drat! i had sprinkling in there but changed it 'cos i had visions of a sprinkler system on a lawn :-)

And yes to a degree, your description of the card is quite suitable. Just for reference, i don't use drugs, prescriptive or otherwise and i learned a long time ago to my cost that alcohol in large quantities do not mix well with an intuitive/psychic. :-)

May i suggest you look up the Temperance card? You can do the 'home-work' yourself, i'm sure you're more than capable. :-)
(Sometimes i like to allow people their little games and mild deceptions. They only hurt themselves in the long run.)
Janet.x

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Hi Anthony
Thanks for taking the time to look at my 'poem'. Most of my 'white noise' comes from the fruit of my loins, and in turn, theirs.
Many folk seem unable to hold a conversation without using their own particular trade-talk.
I think I sort of understand/empathise with 'John'. Before her death, my wife had suffered 30+ years of MS, taking away most things that we all take for granted, and all she really wanted was to have someone to be there for her.
Thanks again
Steve M.

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Hi Anthony, thanks for commenting on ''If i had a pound for..''

ps. just to be a little cheeky and for the want of a comment, you missed one of mine. ''Crystal Moon.'' :-)

Janet.x

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Hi
thanks for your comment on 'Fucking in pink'.
thought you might like to know a little more about the poem...

it's kind of a laugh at people who are bothered about stereotyping/pigeon holing. An ex of mine was so bothered about guys that were pink and moisturise and...etc that I almost bought him a pink top just to piss him off!
It was actually 'inspired' by a guy wearing a tracky top that had pink panels on it. I've not tested the theory yet though!

Cat x

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Thankyou for your fulsome response.
You sing to a different tune than i and until you mentioned it the Wham song hadn't entered my head but it does kind of alter the theme. :-)
I had a song with the line 'you'll never know how hard i tried' in it. Can't remember who sung it or even if it's relevant to the poems theme but there you go.
I see your point and will most likely edit for my files so please don't think your time is wasted just because i might not edit and re-post here. I find if i do that, it leaves an open invitation for everyone to have a go and quite frankly i can't cope with it at the moment. Too sensitive! :-)

Thanks so much for your explanation of a clause too. Put simply like that, it's easily understandable. Sentences- i was raised to believe that a full stop ends a sentence which seems to be all wrong when writing poetry. All very confusing. :-)

Janet.x

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Ta Ant

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Hello Anthony,
thanks for the comment on 'devil and me.'
Weaknesses i have aplenty, particularly in my poems which you often pick up on. :-)
So go on, what are the petty minor details in this one?
Could it be punctuation by any chance?
I do like to incorporate punctuation into my work so go ahead with your suggestions because the ''rules'' for that seem to be very different than the rules for writing a letter etc..
BTW, is a clause the same as a sentence?
It always confuses me when people talk clauses.
Janet.x

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Hi AE,
ta for commenting on my last entry.
"suffer from subconscious comparison." what the barley or the sinister element? hmm. i think you have tied me up in knots slightly.not hard to do. yes, it means a sinister element. I know Sting sang about fileds of the same grain but i live among fields of various stuff and barley was the one i felt lost in in this case. There's quite a lot of it about and it's very tall and green. Easy for the children i was writing of to get lost in.I kinda wishedthey'd got lost in fields of oilseed rape instead to avoid the comparison but it was barley i meant so I'll have to ride this one out.ta. Deb

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cheers for the suggestions, anthony over the three poems.. I normally would work on them a heck of a lot before putting them up but thought I would put them straight up... I am gonna be looking at all three poems in due course, but you are right with your comments so thank you for them!

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Hi Anthony,
Thank you for the link to the children's poetry competition - it's appreciated. I'll check that out.

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Anthony, Really greatful for your recent comments on The Blood Onion. Some interesting observations. Need a bit of time to let them settle, will be back soon. Win

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Potentially explosive?
Well i didn't think you needed to be told a rose without thorns :-)

Janet.x

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I have made some changes to ‘Blood Onion’, which you were so kind to leave some comments on recently. Could you please go to the blog entry and see if you think these changes are for the better or make sense to you.
Your analysis was a great help. It is meant to be 'him' feeling the anguish from the start as she is doing the 'he loves me...' thing in a taunting unfeeling, maybe manic way. Also The word 'throbs' I have decided to stick with it, take your point, it is unusally placed but we can all break the rules a little sometimes I am sure. Ihave written more details on the blog entry. Many thanks, Win

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Thanks for your comments Anthony! I think we can but try get past these social conditions - every time we do we become a little bit more free.

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You have no email address Anthony - wanted to ask your opinion on something - any chance of emailing me - I promise not to stalk you in my red shoes!

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Re-balloon. Oh no! You'll have to do much better than that! I want a rose with it too. :-)

My niece sends balloons up into the sky for each grandparent on anniversaries of their deaths. She did it at the funerals too. Much nicer than throwing soil in the ground. :-)

Janet.x

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hello anthony, thanks for the comments.
Love your curse!! Made me splutter me tea out as I read it (two sugars for me please, its the less harmful of my many vices).
trying to get audio stuff up soon when i get my hands on a mic.
cheers
xx

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Thankyou for your comments on H1N1influenza, perhaps I should have added a bit about the eye( the great eye of Sauron that is)!! I enjoyed your prose above but am particularly drawn to Lifelines. The picture of the woman knitting and the poem are exact, did the pic spur the poem I wonder.
best wishes, jane

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Anthony, thank you for your comments, feedback and support. Its really appreciated. Lucky you living in rural Devon! I have been there as a child, would love to go back...if only I can find the time...need to escape......


thanks again

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Thanks for the explanation of 'fantasy'. Not to blow apart any succouring bubbles, but that 'beach scene' now so prevalent as a romantic icon, would in reality have had sand in body parts not happy with grit.

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Hi Anthony,
If you scroll down on this link to 'News' you can find a couple of recordings of Shafilea's work.
http://www.manchesteronline.co.uk/video/
Cx

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No, you weren't dreaming. It was The Virgin. I hadn't seen the entry Sex Addiction or whatever, when I posted mine. When I saw the other one cheek to jowl so to speak, I panicked. I didn't want mine to be associated with it even by space, because the Virgin is not a joke. I'll put it back. Thanks.

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I understand what you are saying Anthony and can see that too much I could become self indulgent. You are right to say that we need to look at fresh subjects and different ways of expressing the same themes - just so long as we don't inhibit people from writing the things they really need to.
It is all a great exaggeration to say that my legs go up to my armpits BTW - but not one that I object to - a bit of imagination and poetic licence never hurts....
Isobel x

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Dear Anthony,
Thank you for your comment - I appreciate it! As for Shafilea's poetry, it is in her family's possession!
Stephen Smith

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Anthony - not sure if you revisit poems to check for subsequent comments but I responded to you there. Just wanted to say that I am fond of you as a fellow poet - would never take serious offence by anything you said cos I can see that like Steve Regan - you just like to stir things up a bit cos you're mischevious. I like to stir things up too sometimes and you can't do a rant without a bit of venom - can you?
Isobel xx

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cheers me dear. prose looks exciting! i havnt the time to read it now, but am looking forward to sitting down with a brew and having a proper peruse...xx

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Hello Anthony. This will be brief as I am clobbered by adversity right now. You clearly have wide talent. Loved the prose style and was getting drawn in, but no time. Thanks for comment on 'Loss Leader'.

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ps. forgot to mention. I liked the cheeky pic you had before but this one is colourful and it makes me wonder if you chose it at random or if you were drawn to it.

Janet.x

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Hi Anthony,
thanks for your comment and feedback on my poem ' The Healer '. I've included a comment below the poem if you'd like to assist further.
I do agree about the first line so your writing experience will be gratefully accepted.

Janet. :-)

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good Evening Anthony, Ref:Crazy Girl

Thank you so much much for your kind and
encouraging comment, I'm so sorry I have been unable to reply, I have been away for a week or two in Yorkshire. very pleasent and quiet..managed to catch WOL Slam at Hebdon, the town was as quaint and interesting as the poetry.

Once again so many thanks for your most considered interest in my work.
Augusta x

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Crikey, Anthony, do you always dress like that on the clifftops of Devon? And yes, do call in and perform / read at a NW poetry club. Once you get used to the poisonous politics and monstrous egos thrashign around, we are quite a nice crowd.

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Yes - I'd kind of guessed it wasn't your arse Anthony - it looked very much like an image you'd get on google - it was fun though. So the fool has hidden depths then? Just as well since I like to fool around a lot myself and it is a mask I often adopt...
Isobel x

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Oh Anthony - never bow to pressure - unless it's to give me a better view. I rather liked your sphincter and you are anything but a fool.
Isobel x

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Hi Anthony, thanks for your comment on The Body Builders Lament..... Im sure your little beer belly is more attractive than a six pack to most women, judging by some of the comments Ive received!
Love your work. Ive been reading back on some of it and have sent some comments on past poems....... Good thread you put up even if I dont agree with some of your comments!!!! {Watch this space, you may get a mention in my next effort!!!!!!}
Regards Cate xx

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