Thu 9th Feb 2012 17:51
thatnks for your comments on dead rabbits x it had the potential to be a good poem i think but i couldnt be arsed to put the work in. im glad you liked parts of it :)
Comment is about Rory Peace (poet profile)
Original item by Rory Peace
Thu 9th Feb 2012 16:48
Great grubby picture
Comment is about Leaving Home (blog)
Original item by Laura Taylor
Thu 9th Feb 2012 16:01
Rip it up gal and bin it!!!!! It needs to be consigned to the trash.
And move on.
Comment is about Love's Labour's Lost (blog)
Original item by Isobel
Thu 9th Feb 2012 15:44
Laura! You're at it again! Writing great stuff.
Egg-white for hair gel- that's no yoke!
Are you cracking up?
OK, I'll lay off you then.
Seriously though Brill!
John F Keane
Thu 9th Feb 2012 14:57
That's a really great poem. Very compelling.
Comment is about Prologue to a final solution (Scenes from a film unfinished) (blog)
Original item by Andy N
Thu 9th Feb 2012 14:25
A small caveat: the line...
"Hanging out from the carriage window she watched me..." -
sorry, but that seems to suggest the mother was doing the "hanging out"...
Comment is about Goodbye (blog)
Original item by Christopher Dawson
Thu 9th Feb 2012 14:21
Some memorable lines and a wrenching turnaround as it becomes clear the writer is leaving life itself. "Leaving" in all its forms is an often sad fact of life and this is a very laudable look at that all too frequent aspect of our existence.
Thu 9th Feb 2012 14:13
I think culture-free IQ tests are a fairly objective measure of what our culture considers 'intelligence', as is (to a lesser extent) academic performance in 'difficult' subjects requiring mastery of abstract concepts (obviously, all are terms relative to our culture). If such tests 'do not test anything' as their critics claim, why do people who perform well in them tend to live (much) longer, raise healthy children and so on?
At a casual level, it is interesting that while science and technology advance apace, the arts are in a state of regression. At some level, this surely reflects an intellectual imbalance in contemporary civilization - C P Snow and all that. I truly think many of the great artists and writers of old would be unknown today, for the reasons described. Clever people seek difficult tasks and the contemporary arts establishment has deliberately banned all 'difficulty' from the arts, as a matter of semi-official policy.
Comment is about Wanted: the Dickens of a poet (article)
Original item by Greg Freeman
Thu 9th Feb 2012 14:12
Amazing what a uniform can do. But mind that
Comment is about I'm in love with a WPC (blog)
Original item by Philip Fletcher
Thu 9th Feb 2012 14:07
You brought back memories to this 60s youth...
for which - many thanks.
I had a Sunbeam Talbot
And a bright red little MG
But the Triumph - a la Bergerac!
That was the car for me!
I'd drive around the Isle of Dogs
In a nineteen sixties East End
Long before Canary Wharf
Signalled the coming end.
Yobs would throw their stones at me
But little did I care
I had a Triumph Roadster
And the wind whipping through my hair!
Sadly, I do not own a car now but city
living makes it a luxury I can't afford.
But I have the memories...!
Comment is about AUTOMOBELIA / A BLUEBIRD OF HAPPINESS (blog)
Original item by Ian Gant
Thu 9th Feb 2012 13:24
I really like this. These lines are just fantastic:
life is truly about the smallest of things
the tiniest of moments, the barest of experiences.
It's about relationships and not acquisition,
about development not acclaim,
kinship not office.
A legacy of warm memories,
not a written list of credits.
Thu 9th Feb 2012 12:55
Whilst you raise some interesting questions, John, your reliance on the term 'intelligence' for your arguments rather undermines them, as does their rather sweeping nature. What you mean by 'genuinely intelligent' comes across as meaning 'in my, John Keane's, opinion', rather than having a universally recognisable meaning. Thus, the potential for emotive reactions to such a word as 'intelligent' is a clue to your underlying motive here, which is perhaps to provoke debate.
I agree with Greg, that Dickens is likely to have been a TV and radio dramatist, had he been around these days. A bit like Jimmy McGovern, or Bleasdale, Boys From the Blackstuff writer.
Thu 9th Feb 2012 12:52
I love this poem Marianne!
a milky field turned over by the grey whilstling of the gap,.....
Comment is about Painting Consciousness (blog)
Original item by Marianne Daniels
Marianne Louise Daniels
Thu 9th Feb 2012 12:22
Some beautiful words here, I agree with Rory.
Comment is about Connections (blog)
Original item by Brutus Paulinus
Thu 9th Feb 2012 12:20
I really enjoyed this.
"He fields the familiar questions" - what a brilliant turn of phrase.
Comment is about February (blog)
Thu 9th Feb 2012 12:01
A very interesting read Ray and a lovely flow about it.
Thu 9th Feb 2012 11:15
Welcome tony WOL! I'm glad you like cheese cos I know you are a bit crackers!
Nice poem on your profile
Comment is about Tony Hilton (poet profile)
Original item by Tony Hilton
Thu 9th Feb 2012 10:11
Two very different poems about cars, the first charts the what’s and wherefores the second is really a tribute to a bright white Nissan Bluebird and its place in my greatest romance. The Photograph is of the Rolls Royce Silver Spirit we owned for some several years. Now in retirement we have a Ford Mondeo and a Peugeot 308 ‘how boring is that’
Thu 9th Feb 2012 09:19
You wonder, how would Dickens get his themes across if he were alive today? Probably not in novels. Maybe he would be a TV dramatist or screenwriter. Or maybe a scriptwriter for EastEnders or Corrie?
Thu 9th Feb 2012 09:05
*But it raises an interesting question: is poetry in the 21st poetry any more able to voice the kind of issues that troubled Dickens? Should it be trying to? Or is it too inward-looking to attempt it? Maybe it is time to look for the Dickens of a poet to step forward in these troubled times.*
The arts in the contemporary era are not dominated by the most intelligent people. People with very high intelligence tend to be 'creamed off' by the sciences. Once, that was not the case. Before science arose, highly intelligent people pursued the arts because there were no alternatives to attract their interest/attention. People like Leonardo/Shakespeare/etc. would probably not be involved in the arts, nowadays. If they were, they would be frustrated and unsuccessful - since mindless 'novelty' is now the order of the day (Emin's Bed, for instance). A genuinely intelligent individual like Will Self sticks out by contrast in the contemporary cultural scene.
The contemporary arts establishment wallows in formless, know-nothing navel-gazing because it is dominated by the mediocre. Everyone apart from them can see that Emin is as thick as two short planks. The retreat of the arts from scientific, social and political reality reflects the declining intelligence of those in the arts establishment and those they lionize, not the arts themselves. Modern culture is shopping lists, depression diaries and chairs made of twigs for the same reason.
Thu 9th Feb 2012 07:47
Only just found this. Really must pay more attention to blogs. The wisest person I know (as opposed to having read) is a passionate believer that all we ever have is NOW. Which your 'poem' expresses very well, even passionately while raising lovely big questions, as others have said.
And, in the now, saying I enjoyed reading it isn't a bad way to spend a few irreplaceable seconds.
Comment is about Platform (blog)
Original item by John Coopey
Thu 9th Feb 2012 07:18
Yeah, had me feeling all entranced... until the end!
So like you to twist things! But I like it : )
Comment is about The playground of lights (blog)
Original item by Dermot Glennon
Thu 9th Feb 2012 07:10
A sad and heartfelt narrative...
Especially liked these lines:
'I'll never know, I'll never see her again.'
'life is truly about the smallest of things
the tiniest of moments, the barest of experiences.'
Thu 9th Feb 2012 06:40
Hi Tony - welcome to WOL! (Nothing wrong with a bit of cheese!) Hope to see more of your stuff on here soon. :)
Patricia and Stefan Wilde
Thu 9th Feb 2012 00:19
Thu 9th Feb 2012 00:17
I,ll neverever say that your poems
are owtnowt other than goodgear!
(but my come inclusive of teensyweensy
whinge-I thought the last two lines
a tadbit simplistic)
Is that where you fell into a drunken stupor?
Remind me to remind you to kick my head in
next time you see me in Greggs(Accy)
Comment is about Neverever (blog)
Original item by Richie Muster
Hey there! Welcome to WOL (:
Comment is about Tara-Isha (poet profile)
Original item by Tara-Isha
Thu 9th Feb 2012 00:15
Hey there! Welcome to WOL! I'm only a recent member, but the community is nice enough, you'll probably enjoy it here!
Thu 9th Feb 2012 00:13
Imagery seems to be a buzzword for the poems I use tonight; I agree with Mike - took me straight to the forest, and then made me want to get the Hell out of it.
Thu 9th Feb 2012 00:10
Strange combination of weird wood,botanised gurner, and (murdered) innocent Rape of the lock like flittering fireflies, plus a female grotto, ending in a let`s smash it all, nature,myth, and people - the lot!
The `explanation` doesn`t begin to explain where it`s come from...I get the same feeling as Laura`s `plucked too soon` A most peculiar `fairy story` though.
Comment is about buried treasure (blog)
Original item by Anthony Emmerson
Thu 9th Feb 2012 00:08
Comment is about The Crow and the Allotment (blog)
Thu 9th Feb 2012 00:04
Cheers Rory on sugar puffs poem-ha!
and Welcome indeed to WOL.
Loved your biography
especially the last two lines!
Best regards dude!
Thu 9th Feb 2012 00:00
Really enjoy this one; very enigmatic - there's some very powerful phrases there too 'a forest of penetrating humidity' and 'trapped in the comforting walls of perennial stalactite' are two great little quotable lines.
Wed 8th Feb 2012 23:59
Nice flowing poem Mike
Comment is about COUNTING (blog)
Original item by Mike Hilton
Wed 8th Feb 2012 23:56
I like this, some great imagery which creates a very dark mood. (:
Comment is about A Letter To You Whom I Lost (blog)
Original item by Joy Claypool
Wed 8th Feb 2012 23:39
Hi Mike, thank you for your comment on my poem "Here I Am". I've been listening to your poems and have really enjoyed them. They have are definitely powerful.-
Comment is about Noetic-fret! (poet profile)
Original item by Noetic-fret!
Wed 8th Feb 2012 23:06
Interesting comments - thanks. Yes, that bit's about all these stories that come out in the news about child deaths because of the mum's new boyfriend is a psycho thing and what that must do to their young minds when all this is happening. Really didn't want to go down the depressing route though and it was partly due to a discussion just before in which I was telling the person running the workshop that I often use internal rhymes to make certain things hit on a beat for the impact and emotional engagement and I often write poems as cameos of emotional progressions that I've undergone. Hence the postmodern bit at the end.
Dave D Poet Rhumour
Wed 8th Feb 2012 23:05
Hi there Joy - welcome to the wonderful world of WOL! Your sample piece is as Kenneth said, a refreshing item and should guarantee more interest. :)
My thanks to you for the comments you posted on my profile page, glad you like 'The Unknown Child' - I do tend to throw in the odd few anti-war pieces, along with less serious items!
Best wishes, Dave
Comment is about Joy Claypool (poet profile)
Wed 8th Feb 2012 22:18
Now look what you`ve made me do - explain myself!
Isobel is right, although you say you only intended to make it look like a poem, It`s not up to you to say whether it is or not.
I said it was `poetic` which it is because:
1..it is portentous. claiming to deal with serious stuff (talking of ancestry, life, death,flesh, spirits,beasts, the earth etc)
2...It is claiming a sort of obligation to forebears who stuck together, were spiritually at one with and cherished their ancestors and nature, and therefore provide a platform upon which we all stand.
3...It commands us to see that this is so.
This is good, poetic stuff, not a bit like the `slice of life` stuff we often get...whether
it is good or not is for others to decide.
I was struck by Fiona Sampsons remark that poetry was about music, and not just Rhyme or meter, but about a kind of grammar. I think she left out sense (in it`s widest meaning)
This `wot you`ve done`is poetically grammatic, but (for me) the `allows` stops all kinds of surmising about modern attitudes to death.
However from henceforth `squeamishness` can hold it`s head high among any poetic company in the world. (`Grudging` is dead jealous)
For Pete`s sake John, don`t give up doing free verse.
Wed 8th Feb 2012 20:37
This is brilliant, I mean, it's like a punch in the stomach, very powerful, I like "I'll never know, I'll never see her again." for it's utter bluntness, great piece of poetry :)
Wed 8th Feb 2012 20:33
Thankyou very much :) x
Comment is about Conversation At The Party (blog)
Wed 8th Feb 2012 20:32
Thankyou! I was trying to make it not too obvious, but still work out-able (if that's a thing) that the last line is saying that I lost a mate to depression, he took his own life, and "slowly turning into a mirror" is me looking back at the memory of his and realising that I'm going the same way, I mean, I'm not, don't worry, but I thought it'd be a great idea, haha!
But thanks for your comment, I don't think I set any flowers on fire, did I?
Wed 8th Feb 2012 20:17
Shades of Humbert Humbert here Graham. Dark and discomforting, yet still compelling.
Comment is about Muse (blog)
Original item by Graham Sherwood
Wed 8th Feb 2012 19:59
I really like this poem. It speaks of personal anguish and I for one am no stranger to this.
Be well Noris and keep posting.
Comment is about Here I am (blog)
Original item by Noris Roberts
Wed 8th Feb 2012 19:24
Ha ha - I'm obviously not making my poetry accessible enough....
It's not an actual corset Mike - it's just a cartoon picture of one, on a card. This is the closest image I could get to it on google. Not that I would be averse to wearing such an item of clothing though ;)
I'm guessing that squeezing a size 14 into a size 8 rubber dress might have been a tad painful. At least I wouldn't have the same problem, if I took you up on the offer of your leather jock strap - depending upon your other measurements - and mine for that matter :)))
Glad you enjoyed this bit of froth. I will stay well. xx
Steve (Mellor) - I'm blowing you a feathery kiss. x
Wed 8th Feb 2012 19:14
Hi Isobel, can you swap it with me? I'm offering my finest leather jock strap for the lingerie. (hoping it fits like), the last item of womens clothing i wore was a size 8 rubber latex dress. You can imagine my problem as I am a size 14. Still, the talcum powder helped.
Wed 8th Feb 2012 18:12
You've used some very arresting imagery here. I particularly like:
"like a faded winter"
"A single frame in a flick book"
both are equally effective.
There's lots to appreciate in this; clever use of rhyming and similie/metaphor.
Although I don't understand why you set fire to the flowers? :)
Wed 8th Feb 2012 17:44
Thanks, Gareth. I worked hard on this one!
Comment is about Yorkshire Steel (blog)
Original item by Adam Warwicker
Wed 8th Feb 2012 17:37
You have such inspiring writing! I love the style, not too much or too little, and I especially like 'The Unknown Child', it's really powerful and through provoking stuff, keep at it, I'm interested! Joy
Comment is about Dave Dunn (poet profile)
Original item by Dave Dunn
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