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Mon 29th Jun 2015 21:45
so beautifully put as usual Tommy. The emphasis on leaves and litter together with paint and puddles works so well.
Comment is about the paint and the puddles (blog)
Original item by Tommy Carroll
Katy Megan Hughes
Mon 29th Jun 2015 21:41
That I promise Mr Astell!
Comment is about Nigel Astell (poet profile)
Original item by Nigel Astell
Mon 29th Jun 2015 21:39
There is so much power in your poetry as personified by this poem. Keep putting on the blog. I look forward to more.
Comment is about Should i (blog)
Original item by Autum
Mon 29th Jun 2015 19:35
Love such sweet sacrifice
rendered with just the right amount of pain !
Great stuff Rose
Comment is about honey trap (blog)
Mon 29th Jun 2015 17:45
Hey, hey :)
Thanks for giving me a little push to read a formal piece. I read Her Scent on Silk at open mic last night. Went really well :) x
Comment is about Laura Taylor (poet profile)
Original item by Laura Taylor
Mon 29th Jun 2015 14:27
You sweet stray nymph
your wild wayward desires
cease they must not.
Comment is about Sweet Light (blog)
Original item by Katy Megan Hughes
Mon 29th Jun 2015 12:12
thanks all for the kind comments. it gives me much needed confidence!
Comment is about burial (blog)
Original item by Stuart Buck
Mon 29th Jun 2015 12:09
great stuff Stu. It is really the threat and challenge of individuality turned inward or not being received . The metaphor expresses it perfectly.
Mon 29th Jun 2015 12:04
HI RAy Glad you liked my Charlie Parker poem!'
Comment is about ray pool (poet profile)
Original item by ray pool
Mon 29th Jun 2015 11:02
Thank you x
Comment is about day sky (blog)
Original item by Rachel Bond
Mon 29th Jun 2015 10:54
I'm glad you like my simple poem Rachel - the fact that some people wear their faith like a new pair of glasses that last the rest of their lives. I like this poem of yours as it has an expansiveness and at the same a feeling of loss, and a condemnation of material things, essential to a wider view of life!
Sun 28th Jun 2015 22:38
good poem :)
Comment is about JEHOVAH'S WITNESSES (blog)
Sun 28th Jun 2015 22:32
like this..the pace faster and desperate as you describe the fog. cool
Sun 28th Jun 2015 22:15
Hi Stu Thanks for kind comment on Teatime Bulletin!
Comment is about Stuart Buck (poet profile)
Sun 28th Jun 2015 20:44
Oh, dear, Oh dear,
Far from wishing to cause controversy, I re-posted this as a personal reminder of my own, Christian Ideal of marital happiness.
I own absolutely that such a happiness is equally possible to any atheist or any other `ìst` whatsoever. (according to my lights God makes this kind of stuff available to anyone who strives for it)
I don`t mind the comments widening it, but would wish (seeing that this is a poetry blog) that they made any
points about it using the words of the poem.
These are `àbout` an urgent desire for attractive and sexually physical female beauty (including the child -bearing aspect of it), and a recognition that life afterwards would not be all a bed of roses, but end in final happiness.
I was half-expecting to be accused of indulging in an impossible kind of starry-eyed optimism...but there you are!
My - amused - concern about all this recent same-sex stuff is about what happens when they start suing for the restoration of `conjugal` rights. Or (the way it is going) when some starlet pleads to be allowed to wed her chihuahua.
Comment is about A poet at prayer (blog)
Original item by Harry O`N eill
Sun 28th Jun 2015 20:27
Stu, a better description there could not be. It is one I frequently utilise for my condition of the need to write.
Sun 28th Jun 2015 20:22
Thanks david. I have suffered from the big 'D' for many years, possibly all of them, and it has only been the last years or so i have sought help. I have found poetry to be the best therapy I can get. its a form of cerebral emetic unlike anything else.
Sun 28th Jun 2015 20:12
That has some interesting images painted into it Stu.
I see it as a metaphor for depression.
However it is a depression for which there is no relief (as in reality) although the sufferer is caged in his engulfing fog even when it clears there is no real relief, only the prospect of an even more evident loneliness.
I will re-read a few times I am sure.
Sun 28th Jun 2015 15:12
Lovely. Frances ;)
Sun 28th Jun 2015 14:35
Hi Helen, I'm pleased that you picked up on 'melancholy'. Tommy
Comment is about Helen (poet profile)
Original item by Helen
Sun 28th Jun 2015 14:25
Hugh this isn't the right forum to have a serious discussion about monotheism or atheism. I do not castigate anyone for being of a religious bent. One of my closest pals is a vicar. But you are wrong in your attestation:
"a good relationship founded on the loyalty of love is truly a gift from The Almighty".
I did have a choice and I chose well.
Sun 28th Jun 2015 14:15
Hi Helen, I'm pleased that you picked up on 'melancholy'. Tommy
Sun 28th Jun 2015 14:12
Hi Graham. I have re-wrote this piece a number of times over the last 5 years and most changes have been concerning "tears" & "pain" and countless rejigging around them. Even the use of "pain" in verse 2 was rejigged after posting half-a-dozen times.
The wind it tackles
The leaves and the litter
The leaves and the litter
The leaves and the past
The sun it dries
The paint and the puddles
The paint and the puddles
The paint and the past
I saw the land quickly approaching
the bend in the river
that soon would be passed
I saw her look
I knew she was leaving
The leaves and the puddles
The paint and the past.
The original posting.
Quod pleno non compleuit sed abandomed
Sun 28th Jun 2015 13:17
Can't agree Hugh, sorry. As a confirmed atheist married for 44 years now I'm living proof you don't need an idol to believe in. Love exists in everyone. It's just the finding of it!
Sun 28th Jun 2015 13:14
Good work Tommy.
I would have liked the first three (perhaps four five six) verses to have been identically repetitive before the last wonderful gathering up verse to summarize it all.
I like the style, well done.
Sun 28th Jun 2015 13:04
Rose you certainly have some good ideas. I like this analogy and wondered why you haven't developed it further (I'm always saying that I know, sorry).
For instance what if your love had have been entombed? would it not still be beautiful to the outside world an appear precious.
<Deleted User> (13762)
Sun 28th Jun 2015 08:34
well that's a (m)arrow in me eye - I lie pole(t)axed before thee Lady Thatcherley
Comment is about Hastings (blog)
Sun 28th Jun 2015 08:21
Col,U ditch if you want to-this lady (?) is not for ditching.
Sun 28th Jun 2015 01:37
The first thing that I can tell you is that I wanted to have Spinning Mule Elk Mill in the letters of the poem.
So I wrote it as an acrostic poem so that every first letter would spell that out.
Then I wanted it to sound like the mill, so I took the noise from recording of a mill with a spinning mule in.
And then I wanted it to be layers of how people would work for the weekend so they could have a drink so I put that in with words that I knew were northern slang and also mill slang.
And then I wanted it to go full circle so I put word in that would carry on so you'd get to the end and start at the beginning again.
My hope is that you can look up a lot of the words and phrases and trace them back to the mill.
Comment is about On a mat appears...(an early practice poem for a public art commission) (blog)
Original item by CathyLCrabb
Sat 27th Jun 2015 19:11
Huw Thomas, I appreciate your comment. It was well observed and really on par with what I was going for.
Comment is about Left Without a Clue (blog)
Original item by Chandana
Sat 27th Jun 2015 19:08
Thank you for your observation, it was on point. It is a poem about finding self.
Comment is about Out of Breath (blog)
Sat 27th Jun 2015 18:40
Really like this Tommy. It feels very lyrical and melancholy. Some nice poetic tools used with the repetition and alliteration. Good stuff!
Sat 27th Jun 2015 15:20
i dont know. i think everyone is looking for something different. but most people want to escape something! i remember going to a festival several years ago called buddhafield and seeing a myriad of people, all professionals, desperate to forget who they were. they were rolling around on the floor, dancing and singing. i spoke to a few of them while i was there, and they told me it was a good form of escapism. i myself have tried several forms of escapism. the trick is to have nothing to escape from, a difficult thing to achieve.
Comment is about ouroboros (blog)
Sat 27th Jun 2015 14:12
Comment is about Red White and Burbank- Deathy and the Dive (blog)
Original item by Corr Lens
Sat 27th Jun 2015 12:29
only if the wrong to Robert Poste is righted.
and did the goat die?
Review is about Starkadder poetry open mic on 6 Jul 2015 (event)
Sat 27th Jun 2015 10:12
Ray- re Taxi "weary inevitability" spot on. I could not have put it any better. Tommy
Sat 27th Jun 2015 08:02
excuse me i'm new here pls help me how to write my poems here
Comment is about us (blog)
Original item by V'j@¥
Fri 26th Jun 2015 21:14
As I said, it's really nice....
Comment is about Reminiscence (blog)
Original item by aparajita das
Fri 26th Jun 2015 20:32
"Static safety" I love this. Thank you for such a beautifully sad read. This has quickly become a favorite of mine.
Comment is about brahms (blog)
Fri 26th Jun 2015 18:58
Stu, it has a beautiful sadness from start to finish, but the final four lines are hard hitting with a delicate touch, using the poltergeist image softens it, almost confusing the reader which I always appreciate.
It is very real with childlike truth, there is not one indication of anger or bitterness, maybe that tells of something you have come to appreciate and maybe understand.
Fri 26th Jun 2015 17:47
Crispin Blunt just came on the radio.
Comment is about MAKING A POINT (blog)
Fri 26th Jun 2015 17:42
Well bless my Fanny Cradock's
Fri 26th Jun 2015 17:36
i assume this begins when the sukebind comes into bud
Fri 26th Jun 2015 16:59
I like this a lot Cynthia, it's full of fun and wit. And agree with Philipos in it looking like you had fun writing this.
Comment is about Back To Basic Bacteria (blog)
Original item by Cynthia Buell Thomas
Fri 26th Jun 2015 15:57
Loved your photo dorinda on the picture gallery from Marsden on the home page.
Comment is about Stockport WoL (group profile)
Original item by Stockport WoL
Fri 26th Jun 2015 15:47
Come to me.
Stay with me.
each repeated line
the longing you feel.
Comment is about Solstice (blog)
Fri 26th Jun 2015 15:34
A sharp comment at the end making the point very blunt.
Fri 26th Jun 2015 13:27
Here here Harry. You feeling like that too! They were the days eh?
Fri 26th Jun 2015 13:11
Hi Celia. I really enjoyed this piece. x
Comment is about Changes (blog)
Original item by Celia
Fri 26th Jun 2015 12:57
Yes. Having spent the majority of my 20's loathing the acts that made me able to write such a poem, i have, not often, done just the same. I have never been physically abusive to my wife, although we have had some blazing rows. She has given me a good whack on occasion though! I was glaringly under prepared for adult life, as I am guessing many of us were, and the stresses it brings. I think this is the major cause of a lot of these problems.
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