Well you couldn’t really stand – no -

not with all that shemozzle going on

inside your mouth – the water swilling

out the blood – another molar yanked

and costs – sky roofing for a crown to

last- perhaps another year or two – and

that glue, tight packed inside the place

your mates and others call a cake hole -

which dentists give their fancy names -  to

keep you guessing what the price will be.

I often think of countries overseas where

dentistry was used high up on the torture

scale, for dissidents who later came to rule

their proper roost. Then boots were worn on

other feet and thought their job was neat.

Of course the waiting room was nearly just

as bad looking at the sorry faces of those

‘who’ll be next’ to have their molars – tugged

and then the lectures start about the tartar all

around and all the sweet stuff that was downed.

Browned off that’s me at weekends when the

surgery closes for a break and then the nagging

at the upper right begins, and codeine pills

you keep in stock no longer seem to work and

you cursing to yourself for running much too low.



Profile image

Don Matthews

Mon 23rd Dec 2019 06:59

I'm sitting in the dentist chair
(Reminder came by text)
A pretty nurse bends over me
Wait, read what happens next......

My mouth fell open wide-like
She said "Why thankyou Don"
I can now put the needle in
Where it does ache, upon

Reader I did not mouth-gape
To let the needle in
She had a very low-cut top
( I thought shit, rin tin tin)

Don't ask me why a 'rin tin tin'
And not a rat tat tat?
Because it would not fit my rhyme
And that my friend is that

I went under the drill like a puppy dog . He smart dentist cookie. Cost the earth but he now my dentist of choice. Her name is Linda....Google for clinic....


Her last name isn't Lovelace is it?

Why's that?.........

If you wish to post a comment you must login.

This site uses cookies. By continuing to browse, you are agreeing to our use of cookies.

Find out more Hide this message