My First Christmas Poem

My First Christmas Poem

It should never happen to anyone let alone me
The day my tinsel fell off my tree
And I electrocuted myself on the fairy lights
And the angel on top was scared of heights
Needles from the tree are all over the place
And now the bloody thing is rotting at the base
I'm starting to lose my mind and the baubles are missing as well
You can keep your "Christmas Wonderland" 'cos this is a living hell
The foods all ready gone off, what a waste of time
And don't get me started on the bloody home made wine
I got up early this morning and since then everythings gone wrong
The turkey went in the oven twelve hours ago and I forgot to turn the bastard on
Not one sodding Christmas card has come through my door
And once again the angel has fallen on the floor
Now N-Power has cut off my electricity supply
I wanna break down and sodding cry
Send the tree crashing to the ground
Gag the carol singers so they don't make a sound
Stagger up to the North Pole and kick Santa in the balls
The only "spirits" I need this Christmas are Jack Daniels, Jamesons and Bells
Rip of Rudolfs nose and rub it in his turd
Ban the Queens Speech 'cos I don't wanna hear her say a word
And when all the festive folk moan I'll simple say "tough"
'Cos Christmas comes just once a year and thats far too often enough.

Cayn White

◄ A Random Poem Inspired by the Bickering of Poets

Review of a cd wwhich one of my poems appears on ►


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winston plowes

Sat 22nd May 2010 19:16

And once again the angel has fallen on the floor, A fallen angel... great image. Win

Janet Ramsden

Tue 15th Dec 2009 20:57

Made me smile too. Funny!


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Andy N

Mon 14th Dec 2009 13:57

very you, that poem i felt cayn but it made me smile! lol

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Mon 14th Dec 2009 11:41

Well, there is a first for everything...
You have to start somewhere ; )

May the spirit enter you.... as someone once said - LOL x

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