Worcester Beer Festival 2015
The numbers attending this year’s Beerfest were noticeably down, and we were disappointed to find no picnic supplied. Nevertheless we made the best of it…
The numbers were sadly depleted
The picnic had been deleted
But the tennis boys weren’t defeated
The only food on hand to sustain us was a large packet of roast weasel gourmet crisps, a box of coconut macaroons, and a small jar of pickled onions (Lidl 30p, may contain nuts). Jim was particularly fond of the pickled onions and didn’t need more than a cursory nod to tuck into them. He was offered a wooden fork but he wooden have it, preferring instead to forage around with his fingers…which was not easy as the jar had quite a small neck. There was however an added benefit to this as the vinegar nicely dissolved the dirt from under his fingernails.
Jim took a hunter-gatherer stance
The pickled onions didn’t stand a chance
Fortunately his mate wasn’t there from France.
Stewie decided to try his luck with a snake and pygmy pie in a box. It must have been good as he licked out the inside of the box when he’d finished. However he could only manage two bites of the box itself…luckily Jim was on hand to finish it for him.
If you can’t manage it all yourself
And need a good solution
Have a mate standing by
With a cast iron constitution
Elliot brought a young lady (Vicky) whose presence noticeably improved his table manners. The bib caught most of the dribble. They were looking forward to walking the dog together later but we took that as a euphemism.
Elliot was there with non-Spanish Vicky
Martin had thrown an occasional sickie
Dennis popped in and out quickly
He had no ticket and left to watch the cricket
The low numbers had a direct effect on Martin’s ability to negotiate generous discounts from the food outlets, forcing him to pay full price. Sensibly he chose the cheapest fare on offer, starting with a burger which he made edible by smothering it with all the free condiments, then later tried a meatless sausage which was not quite so well received…
Disappointed by the sausage’s worth
But undeterred by its impressive girth
I can’t remember seeing Warby eat anything at all, which probably explains why we were not treated to his customary performance i.e. he was too weak from hunger to give us a moonie!
How does one calculate the probability
Of seeing Warby’s sea of tranquility?
The provision of a picnic would increase the odds
Without it we’re in the lap of the Gods