Raven Beauty

entry picture

Come The Raven, darkest Queen,

With beauty rare, if seldom seen,

And with her come a dire dread,

The finest dread I've ever had.

 

Her sorcery it boils my blood

Commands a spell, for love to flood.

Spite all of dark arts that I know,

I’m Powerless to halt its flow.

 

For free will now, I have, and yet,

Around my neck, a yoke she set,

And lock my heart, in dungeon black,

For captivating means just that.

 

This incantation cast has she,

As runes strewn, tell ruin see.

This charm is strong, my will is weak,

And from it no salvation seek.

 

It conjures fear so terrible,

It staggers heart, leaves gut a full.

A sickness some, mistake for love,

Spare me this, oh God above!

 

I fear this more than hellish lake.

I fear this love, my life will take.

I fear the darkness by she beguile.

I love the lightness, in her smile.

I fear the fire, in her eye.

I love that under, shyness lie.

I fear the power, of her wing.

I love the warmth, that under bring.

I fear the black plumes that she wear.

I love how black, frames beauty fair.

I fear her movement, flight and flow.

I love the way I want her so.

🌷 (10)

Love

◄ NHS Reform

End of Play ►

Comments

Profile image

Anya

Wed 14th Nov 2018 21:17

This is just so brilliant! Man! Who are you! and where have you been! 😘

Profile image

Hannah Collins

Fri 12th Jan 2018 18:29

Beautiful writing.
The magic of love and the fear.

Hannah

Profile image

Beno

Thu 11th Jan 2018 08:25

Keith,
Thanks for your lovely comments. I really enjoyed writing this poem Im glad its given you pleasure.

Stu
The poem was written as homework from pemberton pens. It was for halloween, so I thought I'd try something a bit gothic. Im glad you thought I was successful. I know who Bram Stoker is but I dont know who Elizabeth Bathory is. I'm sure its very complimentary. I will look her up and give her a read.
Both you and Keith have said it is beautifully written. This is a great compliment, thank you. It was only my 6th poem and sometimes I dont think I know what Im doing. I just wing it! LOL.

Ray
Im not sure I was sucessful with this poem in other ways.There was nothin sinister about what I recall feeling. It is about when you meet someone who you really like, and you make a connection, and you can feel yourself falling for them. It cant happen because you love someone else. It all feels like witch craft and its not really in your control. You end up tortured by temptation and desire. Its is a beautiful thing in a strange way.
Thanks for your comments Ray. I'm glad you liked it. I will look up grand guignol!! lol.

Thanks to everyone else for the likes!

Profile image

raypool

Wed 10th Jan 2018 20:17

I agree with Stu on this, Beno, all that influence. What I think may be called Grand Guignol. There's a sense of a perversion of something wonderful , done in the name of something sinister. In a more mundane interpretation, it could also imply a "normal" relationship with controlling undertones that many of us experience on a daily basis.
A very nice poem indeed.

Ray

Profile image

Stu Buck

Tue 9th Jan 2018 13:49

brilliant beno. reminds me of elizabeth bathory, bram stoker and other gothic wonders. bit of poe in there as well. as ever, its beautifully constructed and perfectly written. good one.

Profile image

keith jeffries

Mon 8th Jan 2018 09:37

Hello Beno, This is a skilfully and beautifully composed piece of work which evokes much thought. Your use of the language and rhyme is to be applauded. Well done. Keith

If you wish to post a comment you must login.

This site uses cookies. By continuing to browse, you are agreeing to our use of cookies.

Find out more Hide this message