Bullshitting?

  “Is this the point where you tell me              

       you’ve been bullshitting all along?"         

 

This comment, at 12.33pm on Messenger,

stopped me in my tracks – I had to

question you…

Why say that?  Is this where you are?

Role research? Experimenting on me?

 

I have opened the door for you once more.

You are the love of my life returned

to my room…

‘cos of who you are, who you’ve been.

And who I’ve been - where I’ve been.

 

My labels are cheap, used and tattered.

Yours exciting, money new, and ‘out there’.

Can you ignore…

appreciate the journey, walk the same road

remembering why I react from memories.

 

How did this happen and why now?

The director knows the outcome,

my script done…

Nuances of assistance from higher hands…

mysterious determined effort for lasting love.

 

If the future wanes – dumping my heart…

When I prove not to be what you want…

If my love…

can’t match your carefully constructed,

mental and emotional picture of me today...

 

Rejection!  A resounding slap in the face.

Eternal damnation of idealism – romance.

Proving …

my impossible dreams  have no right

to insert themselves into my reality.

 

I will still love you – hate you first but

eventually settle back to loving you again,

sub-consciously….

I will treasure always your careful words,

your considered approach – all the ‘bullshit’!

 

 

Frances Macaulay Forde © 2003

courtingloveon-lineromance

◄ New Book by David Cooke

Lotto Life ►

Comments

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Frances Macaulay Forde

Mon 21st Aug 2017 16:16

Thanks Cynthia. Your comments, clarity and edit appreciated. 😃

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Cynthia Buell Thomas

Mon 21st Aug 2017 12:34

I like the vicious honesty - the clarity - the acceptance of a 'factor' that simply can't be rationalized, and the waste of life and breath to try. It's a prime tool of emotional survival and self-worth.


I think you may know what I mean. I wouldn't make such a statement to just anybody. Poetry cracks cages.

Check the penultimate line for 'your careful words' -needs an 'r'.

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Frances Macaulay Forde

Mon 31st Jul 2017 18:13

Thanks for reading, commenting and adding me, Lexa. Much appreciated.

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Lyrical Lexa

Mon 31st Jul 2017 14:48

I love the honesty so very much. Especially the opening lines & "I will still love you-hate you first but eventually settle back to loving you again." You have been added to my favorites. 😌

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Frances Macaulay Forde

Mon 24th Jul 2017 18:04

Thank you, David - you know of the power... and Leon, appreciate your comment. Thanks. 😃

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LEON STOLGARD

Sat 15th Jul 2017 21:04

love "nuances of assistance from higher hands" great line.Great poem.

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Wolfgar Miere

Fri 14th Jul 2017 14:37

Hi Frances,

I can identify with the verse "I will still love you - hate you at first"

Having tried so long to hold onto hate it seems that love wins through, which really speaks of its true power, lovely.

David.

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