I still smell you in the dark;
A combination of Gold Leaf fags and stale sweat.
Lungs cringe and throat tightens,
Until I notice my own shallow breaths.
I daren’t close my eyes in case I see your face;
A combination of brown lifeless eyes and sun-beaten skin.
Pulse racing and blood pumping,
Until I notice my own panicking heart.
I can imagine your voice approaching;
A combination of seething rage and impending threat.
Muscles tense and body curls foetally.
Until I notice my own self-angry shame.
I am haunted by your ghost;
A combination of unanswered questions and no closure.
Frozen emotions and arrested love.
Until I notice me and you are actually dead.