Who Invited You?

The trendiest party in all of town

At least trendy by my book

I've brought with me a six pack of ale

And an epicurean look


The host he is a top notch guy

I sit next to him in English

My invite is far from secure

And may have been relinquished


As I enter this terraced house

My heartbeat starts to soar

Hipsters, skinheads, rugby lads

All mope across the floor


I fail to regconise anyone

I can't even name this song

I inspect the living room curtains

Sure I've got the address wrong


Alas this is the right party

I begin to feel out of place

I ascend the darkened stairs

To look for a friendly face


I try to buy some mandy

But I just get rebuffed

My attempts at polite conversation

Are met with utter disgust


As I start to throw some shapes

I see fine girls galore

I thrust myself towards one

And she slaps me in the jaw


It turns out she has a boyfriend

So I enter in a punch up

I receive a fist to my guts

And proceed to throw my lunch up


This almighty scuffle

Has drawn in one or two

Including the boy from English

He booms 'Who invited you?!'


I offer my sincere apologies

I offer to shampoo his carpet

But he just summons his hardest mates

Things were going to get somewhat anarchic


So I'm chased out from the party

Into a neighbourhood I don't know

My home seems miles and miles away

As I splutter through the snow


Now there is a moral deep beneath

All that which I have recited

Parties are no fun at all

Unless you are invited

◄ Lost in the Supermarket

William the Dullard ►


<Deleted User> (11432)

Fri 7th Mar 2014 11:07

Thank you. As it happens I am especially proud of that couplet

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Thu 6th Mar 2014 21:28

I think this one is your best. What clinched it for me was the 'punch up' and 'lunch up' lines :))) In fact it rivals one of my best rhymes ever 'chamydia' and 'riddya'

I do like comedy and this one would perform well.

<Deleted User> (11432)

Sun 22nd Dec 2013 22:03

Thanks for the endorsement. I guess I wanted to tell a tale of failed youthful excess. Hedonism doesn't come that easy to all of us you know.

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