Depth Of A Salesman
I did it babe – I’m the new recruit!
The posh bird in the pin-striped suit
Shook my hand and told me straight
That I was the perfect candidate.
She swallowed all the usual lies
And failed to see through my disguise.
I love the confidence I can win
With a false CV and a cheeky grin.
I did it babe – I got the sale!
I went and spun this guy a tale
Of why our products are the best
And said he really should invest.
I dazzled him with market facts
And told him he could claim back tax.
I wonder what he’s going to do
When he finds out none of it’s true.
I did it babe – I’ll get the praise!
My boss has asked me to liaise
With her at lunch, she must be keen
To promote me within the team.
I guess it comes as no surprise;
I’m better than the other guys.
More confident and target-driven
At home with lying for a living.
I did it babe – I got the sack!
She launched a venomous attack
Upon my personality
And said I lacked integrity.
“A successful salesman must
Be able to engender trust.”
And so I punched her in the gob -
Who’s she to say I can’t do my job?