Title revision in progress!

The water is perfect;

a cool whisper on our skin

like the gentlest caress from an autumn breeze.

Listen to the birds raising the sun

with hymns from their cardinal throats

then you ask me to outdo them,

sing my love for you to the trees

send your name rippling to the far shore

as you draw me close

to the place where I melt

and become you.


Uphold my liquid form with skin warm

your hands butress my back while you bolt me

and make of me a rustless nut.

Reflected shimmer in your eyes

plead mine to open and witness your drowning,

heat explosive. My cry silences beaks,

reverential as we pledge together

with mingled breath and soft hands


then you giggle me with a diamond cascade

send me shrieking into deeper water,

colder, ducking under to avoid another shower,

laughter resounding amid the morning chatter.

And later, chilled and basking on pebbles

skin indenting, air dried and breeze brushed,

the hush deepens, heralding done.

By agreement mutual and silent, instinctive

we dress and take leave of the lucent lake

casting a last glance at the mirror

reflecting nothing now of our revelry,

the moment swallowed like a smile to memory.

◄ Shakespearean

Waking Whispers ►


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Laura Taylor

Mon 18th Apr 2011 15:51

Brilliant. Loved this when you showed it to me, don't know how I missed it before! Giggle me with a diamond cascade - fantastic line x

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Chris Co

Sat 16th Apr 2011 15:48

the moment swallowed like a smile to memory

Lovely line Petrova.

My Best


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Cynthia Buell Thomas

Sun 13th Feb 2011 13:21

I 'understand' that sex in the sea can be a soul-drowning experience. This poem has delightful intimacy and exuberant spirit which is always a matched pair in a rewarding relationship.

Janet Ramsden

Thu 10th Feb 2011 15:19

I absolutely adore that first stanza. Enjoyed it as a whole and i agree with Francine. Nature is seductive ;-)

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Andy N

Thu 10th Feb 2011 08:13

Hi Petrova; - Excellent stuff again - lot of good stuff in here again and it has a excellent flow.. For some reason thou (it's early and it may just be me) but I am not sure about the first line 'the water is perfect' - it may work better coming in on the second line.. just food for thought but i like it either way... xx

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Wed 9th Feb 2011 23:35

Mmmm... How nature seduces.
You have some lovely, romantic expressions in this!

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Elaine Booth

Wed 9th Feb 2011 21:37

Some great images here - good to be able to reread this one again and enjoy.

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