Closing My Eyes

I close my eyes and vividly visualise

Manic times spent unwise

Remembering the by the bys’

The peaks, the highs

The troubles, the sighs

Why can’t I let sleeping dogs lie

Recalling the past consolidates my demise

The times I thought of trains, viaducts and ways to die

Periods when I’ve given it one more try

Used a smile as a disguise

Even though the tortures inside me rise

And call out for me to hide

Sometimes I just stay in bed and silently cry

Months pass and my spirits fly

Normal feelings come as a surprise

But rapid cycling kicks in and my mood slides

The longer I stay in bed and close my eyes

The more depressive thoughts are re-applied

I wish bi-polar mood disorder had made me wise

That I didn’t see personal failure as a depressive guise

Deep down I know that living a life of contentment is the ultimate prize

Bring it on, I’m ready for the ride

I want to try it out for size

Mindfulness will keep my eyes open wide

◄ But

General Infection ►

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