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Bullet

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I am steam on an open window

footsteps in a blizzard 

receding swell

of a punishing tide

the kid gloved hand

of a self that died

peddling scraps

to those who’d be fed

hiding horizons

from those who’d be lead…

 

Insidious as a risk assessment

my bullet point well punctuated

I don’t bite the bullet

I don’t site the bullet

I load the stink

then pass it on.

Bullet

◄ How Clever is my Daughter?

Praying ►

Comments

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winston plowes

Fri 1st Oct 2010 12:27

How lyrical Isobel... Loved some of the associations in this. In fact the first 4 lines have inspired a little poem of my own. Isn't it great how poetry of others can do this. Win x

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Cate Greenlees

Tue 28th Sep 2010 11:24

Nothing worse than the swines who make the bullets for other folk to fire.
It took me a long time in life to realise I was firing other peoples bullets, and learn to play them at their own game. Nice one Isobel.
Cate xx

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Isobel

Mon 27th Sep 2010 22:56

Thanks Steve. I like the word insidious - it describes such people well. The risk assessment is to do with how they might work out tactically all the likely repercussions before making any move whatsoever. Unlike the person who acts openly on instinct and is ready to meet any backlash personally and head on.
That makes me sound rather paranoid and condemnatory. We all lie on a scale - no-one is perfect. This is not a poem condemning the use of steady, considered action - just the manipulation of others and the abdication of responsibility.

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Isobel

Mon 27th Sep 2010 13:29

Tee hee - you are right about the punctuation Ray. I could have thought harder about it but often when you put it in, it chops the poem up when you want it to flow. If you add commas rather than full stops, you have lots of independent clauses running into each other. For better or for worse, I just decided to let this one go without.

I like my poetry to be understood. I think this one is ambiguous enough to be about lots of things. It could be about the Bush/Iraq fiasco. Sending young boys out to do your own dirty work. Making decisions that have no impact on your own life...
It could be about drug dealers, profiting from drugs that have no impact on their own health.

It is actually about people who don't say what they think but get others to - loading the gun and then handing it over. Though I have used the idea of passing the stink on, like children did in the playground a long time ago.

I think we've all known shit stirrers in life, may well qualify as shit stirrers in other people's eyes. Such people vanish when the shit hits the fan, or hold back waiting for which way the wind blows before nailing their colours to the wall.
It's not a trait I like so I thought I'd write a poem about it. :-) x

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Greg Freeman

Mon 27th Sep 2010 10:31

I don't pretend to know exactly what this is about, but I just liked the music and power of the lines: blizzard, tide, died, fed and lead, and the hiss of "insidious as a risk assessment". I've always thought of "risk assessment" as a jargon term, but it really works here.

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Ray Miller

Mon 27th Sep 2010 10:15

What an intriguing poem. The subject in the first half seems to be offering hope, or at least escapism, yet I see at least one person has reached a different conclusion."hiding horizons from those who'd be lead" I like that very much - the play on "lead". Now I think on it more it sounds like you're describing a drug-dealer.I was going to say that I couldn't relate the two halves very well, perhaps I can now. As an aside "bullet point well punctuated" I can't see why a poem such as this oughtn't to be well punctuated. Or at least punctuated! Enjoyed it a lot.

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Isobel

Mon 27th Sep 2010 08:49

Thanks all. Andy - this poem isn't about me. I'm definitely a bite or site kind of girl LOL xx

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Andy N

Mon 27th Sep 2010 08:17

lovely, isobel with a particular strong ending i felt.. i like the fact you pass it on... top stuff (One of my favourites of yours i think this) x

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Elaine Booth

Sun 26th Sep 2010 23:15

Irresponsibility succinctly stated. Full of bite and anger at those who reap the rewards whilst robbing the masses.

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Francine

Sun 26th Sep 2010 15:42

Thought-provoking and not a very encouraging handprint on our world.

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