The unplanned morning unfolds

And It makes your blood run cold.

For lurking on a coreflute sign

An unseemly fate foretold..

 

Of a conveyance hated by the masses

Since it’s very first trip.

When somebody, after riding it said, 

this is really shit…

 

The faces of those onboard

read like a horror novel.

As they sit there fiercely seething

While being shaken, bumped and wobbled.

 

The train replacement bus 

is a lurching, throbbing beast.

It lies in wait and takes visceral delight

From passengers on which it feasts.

 

To be seated in this miserable thing

Of steel and glass and vom

Is an ignominious start

And hated all along

 

The joy it gets from traffic jams,

And pothole, kerb and gutter.

Shakes you around unmercifully 

the driver’s a sadistic nutter.

 

AC set on 10 degrees

blasting at full bore. 

Despite outside hot or cold

you are frozen to the core.

 

The brakes have just two modes 

Nothing or a brutal halt

Adding more violence to the journey 

To further this assault.

 

Nearly there yet not moving

and everything vibrates.

To walk is clearly faster now

God how this grates.

 

When will this end?

When can I be free?

As time drags slowly then slower, 

bloody hell, now what??? I really need to pee!

 

Arriving at the city

Bruised, shaken and frozen.

Somehow I survived

Though my life force is broken.

 

The thing that unites us,

Is not politics, art or sport,

It’s mutual hate of the PTV bus 

Erroneously called - Transport