Jack & Jill

Jack, being a responsible lad, before going up the hill

took Jill to the clinic and put her on the pill.


But Jill, being a devious girl with her body clock ticking

didn't take the pill before she let him put his dick in,

four months down the line she felt the baby kicking.


Jack went mad and said you've ruined my bloody life.

Jill said you can fuck right off I'm not your bleeding wife.

Jack slapped her round the face; she slashed him with a knife.


The only thing to dress it with was vinegar and brown paper

so he took himself down to A&E as fast as he could caper


Footnote : Jill had the baby and lived with her Mum, also an unmarried mother. Jack paid maintenance and was allowed to see the child weekly, though often he would turn up to find no-one at home. Jill become pregnant again by another man. Shortly after the second baby was born she was given a two bedroom council flat and lived happily ever after.

◄ Keeping It Warm



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M.C. Newberry

Wed 23rd Nov 2022 16:15

Agree with SA.
Jack and Jill had a passing thrill
And now the tax-payer foots the bill. 😐

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Stephen Atkinson

Wed 23rd Nov 2022 12:09

A true modern nursery rhyme 😆

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