stop sitting in that Paris street
you know I hate it when you crash
through all the flags that people wear
and all the chords are played by shoes
in the music of the crowds
with melodies of rushing by
while you sip coffee graciously
the whole wide world will brush your arm
and stirring won’t control the flow
your thoughts are slowly leaking
eventually the day has flown
and all you did was watch a while
but did you change a single thing
you always said you’d write a life
perhaps without you knowing
Sun 29th Nov 2020 08:41
Three stanzas of five lines – the first four lines of each contain eight syllables (the word “eventually” was tricky but poetic licence allows), the last lines have seven syllables; I didn’t want it all to be “square” so to speak - eight syllable lines throughout in traditional four line verses - so I went for five lines and I wanted the last lines slightly off balance to reflect how a writer can surprise, maybe even unsettle a balance.
Overall I think it has a satisfying poetic flow.
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