God and the Devil went out for a drink
I know this sounds like the beginning of a joke
But I sware on a stack of bibles its true
It’s happening in a pub tonight near you!
I’m glad lockdown is easing Dad
said the Devil
What do you think?
God sat for a while having a think
I’ll give it some thought
while you buy me a drink
What would you like?
Said the Devil
A glint in his red eyes
The first ones on me…
he went on
Laying on the table his scythe
That’s nice of you Son
I’ll have a larger and lime
While I put my poor feet up
I’ve been having a busy old time
It’s nice to get out every once in a while
Said God to his Son
As he sat there beguiled
Do you remember that day
When Jesus turned water into wine?
I’ll think I’ll try that Dad
You can watch over me while I turn mine.
So away to the bar, the Devil set off
and the bloke on the next table
started to scoff
Yea! Like he really could turn water into wine
If you’re that clever God do the reverse to mine
Handing God a glass of expensive red wine
If your so powerful and almighty, divine
Standing at the bar in the mirror Devil saw
Behind him what was transpiring
at the table by the door
God had picked up this geezer
And was throwing him out!
The whole pub erupted and in one voice all proclaimed
“YER!... CAST HIM OUT” came the united unison shout
Good for you God…
And God and the Devil never paid for another drink all night.
Well thanks for a great night Dad before we leave
I’ll just nip to the loo, myself to relieve
Giving a wink to the topless bartender
With silky long hair and legs Oh! So slender
Standing at the urinal
She came, stood by Devils side
Whose red eyes opened wider, ever wider and w i d e
Standing shoulder to shoulder, together they both stood
(Both with the future of mankind in their hands)
“Get thee behind me Dad”
Well I mean to say, you would.
Po 04/07/20 The day lockdown eased.