We always love a comedian, a clown.
I loved his high pitched laugh
So wild and free
But now he says it was all manic
Not joy but misery.
We loved his self deprecating humour
Which we thought was trying to make us see
The crazy silly things about ourselves
But now he says he was tearing himself apart onstage
And we thought it was to make us laugh and cheer us up
To self identify on our pagan, modern, masochistic,
Every day comic ride of life,
But now he is saying it wasn't meant to make us laugh,
It was a cry for help we couldn't hear,
It was a prelude to his suicide.